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Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Throwing Stones

My friend Lucy, once many years ago was frustrated with her job and I found her on the roof of our apartment building throwing rocks at the moon.  I remember that night, the moon was one of HUGE moons it seemed, big and full and she had this ethereal look about her as she stood there loping stones.  Well, until one hit a window or something and we both bolted from the roof.  We didn't mean it, but yeah that was bad.  Lucy had that way about her, she just grabbed the world and held on tightly.  When I wrote the post on life being a banquet it was her I was thinking about.  She always told me her husband Schroeder was playing pretend until she met him.  She dragged him kicking and screaming to the banquet.  

Lucy is the banquet.  She is always commenting and remarking on how great life is, of course she knows something about it.  As a child she was diagnosed with leukemia, and spent much of her early childhood in and out of hospitals.  I guess that forged her unique perspective and insightful views on the world around her.  She's traveled all over the world, I think maybe twice and never repeats.  Last year she talked Schroeder into riding motorcycles across India.  He, unlike the trip to South East Asia, a couple years before was leery about it and though he never said, I don't really think he likes motorcycles much.  This year Lucy told me she is going to start mountain climbing.  Yes, start.  She has been taking classes on it, and is going soon on her first mountain climbing experience.  Now it gets interesting the reason she's doing this is because she wants to climb Mt. McKinley next year and year or so after that she wants to climb Everest.  Yeah, Mount Everest.  

Well, I guess that was the plan until Schroeder put the kibosh on the whole thing.  He said stamped his foot and gave an unequivocal, nonnegotiable no to her.  I guess the reason most would think evident, it's a little crazy.  But that's not the reason, the reason is he knows she will do it.  He worries that when she sets her sights on something, she will make it happen or die trying.  It's the die trying he wants to avoid.  

So the other day she called me, and I went over there and found her throwing stones at the moon, but this time with little danger of hitting anything.  She was genuinely upset that he's told her no normally because no is just not in his vocabulary.  I listened carefully as she talked and eventually came around to the fact that he said no because he loves her so much and cares about her.  There wasn't much left for her to say after that, instead the two of us just sat quietly, throwing stones at moon. 


  1. Your friend Lucy sounds like a great person and I can understand why you enjoy her company. I like the idea of throwing stones at the moon when you're frustrated but it's good she realized he had her best interests at heart.


  2. Everest has a lot of press, but insanely dangerous. Like climbing onto the wing of an aircraft while it is navigating the jet-stream, but the wing is covered with snow and ice.

    There are many challenging peeks in the pacific NW and Alaska which are professional grade. IMHO, your friend's husband loves her and the "NO" was out of love.

    I thought your post was going to be about the Grateful Dead song. ;-} "The rich man in his summer home, saying just leave well enough alone......"

  3. FD Sir, she's a hoot, really she is.

    s-h, the kids they dance and shake their bones...ahhhh the memories. I was actually listening to the GD while I wrote that post, one of the live disks Hundred Year Hall.


  4. We all can get so stubborn at times.

    I think Lucy is on to something though. I've been trying really hard to change my mentality about life. It is meant to be lived, not just survived. Some days though....

    Great friend you have, we ALL need a friend like this to remind us.

  5. Gray, I wish often really often I can be as bold as she is. But, no way, I'm not cut that way. I will say that she is a HUGE influence and not always in a good way.


  6. Two thoughts. One I think it should be pointed out as great a friend as Lucy sounds I think she is lucky to have such a great friend.

    Two I often wonder why when people talk about seizing life and living to the fullest they often talk about doing things where you could die, mountain climbing, sky diving and so on. Why does nobody believe you can grab life and live to the fullest in the company of good friends over a nice meal and a good bottle of wine.

    Life is lived to the fullest when you experience it for all it has to offer in every moment. It is attitude not an event or a project.

  7. I agree with Sir J's last comments, it doesnt have to be a huge undertaking to be "living life to the fullest". I do admit her desire to do these wonderful things. As much as you a blessed to have such a wonderful friend, she is bless to have you. Someone who will throw stones at the moon with her and ponder the great things in life.

  8. I loved this, mouse. I think I would adore your friend Lucy ... one special friend for a special friend.

  9. Lucy sounds so much like the friend I had who was murdered 10 years ago. She had a lot of horrible things happen to her in her late teens (medically speaking) and faced death more than someone her age should have to. I think that sort of experience does give people a very unique look on life.

    She was such an inspiration to me and I miss her so damn much. Damn it... now I'm crying.

    Thanks so much for this post. As much as it hurts to be reminded of my friend, it helps to remember all the good things that I loved about her.


  10. Mouse, I understand your friends desire. Even with throwing rocks at the moon, she seems to feel stifled, is there something else going on? CD

  11. J Sir, Lucy is Lucy...she's done all kinds of things. I do see what you mean, I think some get confused with it, but, I dunno. I kinda admire her that she's so fearless and open to all of life's possibilities. Thank goodness though she has Schroeder to keep her grounded.

    kitty, I guess I really didn't see it that way...hmmm

    selkie Lucy is fun, highly opinionated and just kick to be around.

    ((((((((spirited one))))))))

    CD, I don't know if she feels stifled or not, I don't think she does. I think she's just the type that is used to not being told no by Schroeder.

    Thanks Jz!


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