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Friday, October 2, 2009

Season of the Witch

Fall is coming, not quite here yet but is definitely making her presence known.  In the morning I pull on socks, it's not cold enough yet to require them at night like I do during the winter months, and the ceiling fan is getting a much deserved rest.  If I don't go into work, sweatshirts are becoming the standard.  I haven't turned on the heater, yet, but it's coming soon.  I had a friend who used to refer to fall as Season of the Witch.  I kinda got where they were going, as fall seems to be a time of dying and back in the Salem witch hunt hysteria days, witches were often accused of simply touching something and having it wither.  Talk about over-active imaginations.  


I've been having a bit of fun with Subservient Husband talking and using Grateful Dead references lately.  I mentioned once that music is my poetry.  Poetry has never been a big favorite of mine, and it's something that I was supposed to write, like back in high school or college it frustrated me to no end.  Yet, I can relate to music and when I think of poetic music, I think of the Dead.  


When I get all deep and introspective, there is a song by them that screams in my head, however to me it's more than a song, it's poetic, and like most of the Grateful Dead songs, the lyrics were penned by R. Hunter.  


All the years combine, they melt into a dream
A broken angel sings from a guitar.
In the end there's just a song, comes crying up the night
thru all the broken dreams and vanished years...


...It all rolls into one and nothing comes for free
there's nothing you can hold for very long
And when you hear that song, come crying like the wind
It seems that all this life was just a dream 


When I think of Alpha that is the song I hear in my head and my heart.  Those lines, those words, those lyrics speak to me and I feel exposed by them.  Sometimes it aches, sometimes it just pisses me off, but the words are there.  The broken dreams, the vanished years and it does all roll into one.  Nothing with Alpha came for free.  I didn't see it until it was too late and I lost me.  


That's just not the end of the story.  Just the chapter...

8 comments:

greengirl said...

For not liking to write poetry, you have a very poetic sense of the world, or at least you express a very peotic sensibility.

My favorite had long been Ripples. But recently I wonder more if the path is made for our step alone, or if two people can truly travel together.

mouse said...

green girl, thanks, that's a wonderful compliment. I think when go down a certain path there are lots of people with us.

mouse

elihu said...

i agree with greengirl, your writing is very eloquent and flows so nicely.

mm, i love the way music shapes our perceptions of experiences. it gives me the words to describe when i cannot find my own.

Anonymous said...

i've never heard it called the Season of the Witch... I like that!!

xoxo

Cala Gray said...

You write so beautifully mouse. You really do.

selkie said...

some music speaks to the soul... truly.

I like your understanding that it was just a chapter; a hard one, harsh and cold, but nonetheless only some pages in your life.

Had you only known what was coming if you had read ahead it would have given you heart.

mouse said...

maggie, thank you! Music is a huge thing to me. I dunno maybe it's because I grew up listening to the radio, or all the concerts I've seen.

kitty, yeah weird huh? My friend always called it that.

Gray, coming from you that is such a HUGE compliment.

selkie, I thought long and hard about if my life were a book, and decided that Alpha would really just be a chapter. Yes long, but still just a chapter of whatever will come.

Sometimes I would love to be able to read ahead, but I don't know if doing that and taking a detour around bad stuff, you miss something deeper in yourself.

hugs to everyone and enjoy the weekend

mouse

turiya said...

I also agree with greengirl. I think it's the music in our souls that can do it to us, though. :)

I love fall in the northern hemisphere... mostly because of Halloween (my favorite holiday), which has been adopted from Samhain and celebrated by witches. Of course, like I mentioned on Tiggs blog... I'm lucky here in the southern hemisphere. I get Halloween in October and then Samhain in April... twice the fun! :-D

I know how you feel about having lost so many years. Sometimes it makes me angry too... thinking about how different my life could have been. Then other times I think about how those bad times have shaped who I am today. It sucked, but it made me who I am... and I love me! :-D

~spirited