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Thursday, February 25, 2010

Behavior unbecoming a slave





That's what I was accused of.  Behavior unbecoming a slave.  A man contacted me via email and offered his opinion on what a bad slave I am.  I guess the part about wanting to smack O's smug smirk got to him.  He corrected me on behalf of all slaves and Masters.  And further speculated that I should be punished for having such a wicked thought.  Giving me the old..."if I were your Master, I'd..."  He also explained that his slave would NEVER have such a thought.  


It brings me to something that really is an issue for me, the purpose of this blog.  Is it just talk up how great slavery  is, and that O is just the greatest thing since sliced bread and peanut butter?  Sure it could go very much like this...


Omega is the MOST wonderful Master in the world!  Anytime I have anything buried deep in my little slave brain, I can bring to him and he will tell me how I should think.  When he wants to play, use me, or perform his maintenance I just go willingly and never once scream, cry or even whimper.  My nights are spent on my knees existing ONLY to serve Master.  I don't anticipate his needs because that is very unslave like to assume what Master might want.  Instead I just wait for his direction.  I may wait for hours for direction but I don't mind.  He is wonderful!  


I am happiest when Omega just tells me what to do and what to think about everything.  I have no independent thought in my head.  Because independent thoughts are wrong for a simple slave girl to have.  That could lead to other things.  Like questioning Master.  Judging his character and other stuff like that.  Can you imagine judging a Master's character?  Who am I to do that?  I'm just a slave.


Instead I'm honest about my feelings, misgivings, heartaches, and joys, happinesses, pleasures...


I'm sure the readers of this blog understand what I mean.  I'm honest about all my emotions, the good, the bad, and the ugly ones.  I write this blog for myself first and for O, so that he can have insight to my vast emotions.  To me its a diary of my thoughts, and how I change as time passes.  If you want to read something about how wonderful it is to be a slave, how everything I was before was replaced with what O wanted, then this blog really isn't for you.  There are, I'm sure, hundreds of blogs out there that will just talk about the good things, without a single contradictory thought.  I hope you find them entertaining.  


Here's what I really don't understand, if my blog is supposed to be honest and I never include any negative thought, how is that being honest?  How can I always be happy about everything?  How can anyone?  Yes, life has ups and downs, and some choose not to focus on downs but that's not what I'm talking about.  I'm writing only about how I feel sometimes as a slave.  


At least with Omega he knows exactly what he's dealing with.  

16 comments:

  1. LOL... good thing he's not your Master then, huh? It's obvious he's looking for a doormat... his own little personal robot with no thought or emotion. The one thing running through my head when you said that he said that his slave would never think things like that was... yeah, he might think she doesn't, but it's probably more that she doesn't share her true feelings and thoughts with him out of fear of his reactions.

    It's kinda sad, really... a slave should not have to live in fear of expressing how she feels. How can her Master truly know her if she is stifled in such a way?

    spirited

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  2. OK, so either he's an unthinking moron or his slave is.
    Or both.

    Either way, you and O win!
    (pom-poms for you!)

    hug!

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  3. As a slave myself, I agree that we need a place to vent and share opinions and thoughts, without the same being deemed unbecoming of a slave. My Dom also allows me to express myself freely on my blog. In most cases, he has read it before I've had a chance to let him know I've posted something. There are times when I cannot put into words how I feel or what I'm thinking, but I can with my fingers on the keys.

    I think we are both very fortunate that our Doms give us the freedom to express ourselves. I truly love serving my Dom, no matter what his needs may be. I know that he cherishes me as his sub. My having a blog and freely expressing myself allows for him to be able to see areas where he needs to mold and shape me to better serve him.

    Your admitting that you had that thought helped me tremendously. Thank you again for your honesty!!

    Irony's sub

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  4. Well said mouse, how boring and disingenuous would be a girl who has no contrary thoughts, impulses or reactions.

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  5. Great post! You know, lots of us wear different titles: mother, sister, perhaps secretary or CEO, submissive or slave or even Domme... but we are all individual human beings. We experience all the same emotions at some point! And I think that if I didn't love and trust my own "Master" enough to want to express my feelings and needs (and gauge how he is feeling--he doesn't want to have to request everything, just as I don't!), then we don't have a true, lasting, loving relationship. If some want to play power games, fine, that's okay for them, but for me, my submission wants to go deeper into my heart than that.

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  6. Mouse,

    Hmm, I've learned something new today. Apparently I care about you on some level, because I am now just plain pissed off. I am working on the assumption you were the you I have generally seen, and that you were fairly polite to the aforementioned.....individual. Normally I try to stay away from the "If I was your master" bullshit statements, but today I think I'll offer my own.

    Here it is...

    If I were your master, I'm certain I'd have to scold you for tolerating such absolute uncontained monkeyshit so calmly and politely. If I were your master I would certainly order you to immediately reach out to this....individual in order that you express to him what a pinheaded needledicked clueless wannabe phony I'm sure you see him as (And believe me, if I were actually your master that's exactly how you'd see him by now, because I'd have taught you that). If I were your master I would then remind you that you get to sleep in my bed because you have the guts to share your real and true self with me "Warts and all" as the saying goes, instead of putting on some false Barbie Doll front all the time and keeping that real you from me.

    I would also be very interested in seeing evidence of this slave he supposedly has, because my gut tells me she's one of three things

    1)New and also clueless, and therefore doesn't understand what a jackass her "master" is.

    2)One of those "slaves" that puts her collar on an hour at a time, Then removes it and goes home or

    3) Inflatable. (Number three is my guess)

    Since you are not my slave, I will ask that you ask Omega permission, and then if you care to, let said pinhead know he might want to read my blog, since he's about to be a topic.

    I hope you have a more pleasant evening Mouse, and please tell Omega I said hello.

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  7. Grrr... I'm sorry, have I missed something? IS there some International Bureau of BDSM Standards that defines who is a submissive, who is a slave, and what is the appropriate behavior under any circumstance you can think of?

    Doms and Masters don't get licensed, and their subs and slaves don't undergo rigid testing by any outside organization.

    We're talking relationships here. All that matters is what works for you and him. Period.

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  8. OMG... LMAO @ MC... I can't wait to read that post!!!

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  9. I was intending to reply to this once my pain meds had settled down somewhat, but thanks to MagnusCattus, now I don't have to, he summed it up quite nicely in my opinion, and there is no way I could improve on what he has already said.

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  10. As a Dom, I like some feedback of the mood and thoughts of my sub. Even if it does come across a bit a being sassy. I think most Doms/Masters, to some degree at least, want and need some type of reaction form you. Partly because we enjoy pushing your buttons. But also, if we don't get a reaction, then we can only assume that you aren't being pushed enough and may push even harder, when in reality that could be detrimental. Not all the time, but I like making my sub do something and getting the look of "you gotta be kidding me! really?!?!" LOL!

    I agree with everyone else. The aforementioned guy is an asshole and deserves no sub. Yet, he could also just be viewing your reaction as insubordinate and worthy of correction. Yet, any of us who expect no feelings or reactions from our subs and crazy for thinking such. I don't want a robot. I want my pet and all that she is!

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  11. mouse - I like reading about your reality better.
    Ally

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  12. Okay... I just saw Sir J's comment and I just had to go back and read cause I knew I must have missed something the first time I read it. Then I saw it there plain as day in the first paragraph "He corrected me on behalf of all slaves and Masters" and now I am simmering... well on my way to boiling point.

    How dare he speak for people he doesn't even know. How presumptuous and arrogant of him to think that he's of like mind with everyone in the lifestyle and that he has the right to put words into our mouths.

    It's bad enough that he felt he had the right to correct you in the first place, but then to assume that he can scold you on behalf of the entire M/s community?

    *simmer simmer simmer... boiling*

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  13. To all:

    My reaction to the email upon reading it was similar to MC's comment. It took several revisions to put my palpable hostility aside to his presumptuous drivel. Mouse was very polite in her journal offering, as that individual was far more caustic than she deserved. It was insulting to her and to a lesser degree myself.

    Thank you all for demonstrating unwavering support to mouse.

    Omega

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  14. Been lurking for a while and now just had to speak up: what an idiot that guy who sent you the e-mail is! Hope you didn't take it to heart.

    Thank you for sharing so much of yourself here and may I just say that you seem to me a very resilient, good and intelligent person.

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  15. mouse
    Well I am so happy to hear you were corrected by someone who definitely knows what is best for you. Thank goodness, otherwise I would have had to do it myself.

    Okay. I have now stopped laughing and will pull back my sarcasm. :)

    It never ceases to amaze me how people think a slave should only ever want to be "perfect" and that should she (or he) have any negative or playfully cheeky thoughts about her Dominant that she be brutally punished. You know sometimes I am sincerely angry with Master. I mean the kind of anger where if looks could damage I am certain Master would have an owie somewhere on his body.

    There are times when Master has said something that genuinely hurt me and guess what, I did not want to get on my knees and worship him. No. I wanted to retaliate, to hurt him in return. Do I? Hopefully not. But to say I never would is a lie. I am flawed. I say things out of anger. I am also incredibly cheeky and playful but I do try to be respectful at all times. Do I succeed always? No. I do not believe this makes me a horrible slave, one that requires sincere punishment.

    Every relationship is unique. What works for one couple might not work for others and when people say "you are a disobedient slave" without owning you is insulting.

    ~cockdoll

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