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Monday, October 25, 2010

More thoughts on Correction and Punishment

On Friday mouse answered many Formspring.me questions.  One of those questions was answered in a post found here.  Which led to Florida Dom asking the following:  

Florida Dom said...

How does Mouse handle the pain when she is punished?

And is she punished often and what kind of disobedience gets her punishment and is Omega sometimes lenient when she breaks a rule or are punishments automatic so she knows she can't slack off.

FD

Yet another brilliant question!  Handling the pain during a punishment is hard, difficult but also at times needed.  Omega said many times that pain must be used carefully when punishing a masochist because on some level it can lead to acting out to receive pain.  

He believes all punishments should be just that a punishment or correction from bad or unacceptable behavior, or in other words a willfully ignoring the rules or codes of conduct.  When pain is used it's intense and continues hitting mouse so that subspace is impossible, instead staying and enduring the torture (seems like such a harsh word but also applicable). Carrying on through the pain is the only option since he won't stop until he's convinced the lesson is learned.  Crying, cajoling, screaming, begging for mercy will have no effect.  Also a final note, since Omega is a sadist, the punishment must be only for mouse and her growth, not to satisfy a sadist desire.  

Thankfully punishment isn't a huge part of our dynamic.  Talking and discussion along with praise for doing the right things more often is.  Omega firmly believes punishment should fit the crime, if mouse is overly chatty, Omega will tell her to "Be Still".  He is not beyond using humiliation to keep mouse in line (something he agreed with Alpha about).  We've gone out to restaurants where Omega has ordered something for mouse that wasn't horrible but reminded her of her place in a very subtle way.  Like chicken in a steak house (seriously who does that?). He will spill his seed on the floor and make mouse lick it up.  He has in the past urinated on mouse.  


Punishment is reserved for willful and repeated breaking of rules and can vary depending on the circumstance.  Often his justice is swift and to the point, other times he will take the time to decide how important the rule is to him, and what correction is needed if talking/discussion has failed.  Very often Omega understands that leniency is required and appropriate.  


It should also be mentioned he does believe in the teaching of Sun Tzu. He strongly believes that the first time that a rule is broken might be because the rule itself was unclear or vague.  If that is the case it is his failure and not mouse's.  However if the rule was clear, then it's mouse's failure and must be dealt with to avoid future disruptions in our well-balanced dynamic.


Again this is something that hasn't happened often.  Most times discussion once is all that's required, or the issue being added to mouse's focus rules.  Where mouse must meditate and embrace the rule(s).  So, if that fails then yes, punishment might be needed.  


Thank you Florida Dom Sir for a wonderful question!


Hugs,
mouse


3 comments:

BiancaSmith said...

I really enjoyed reading this, and I shall have my love read this as well because we are just not starting to find out what punishments are good for us, and how each of us does. I think you may very well be my favorite blogger mouse, your blog has already helped me a lot.

turiya said...

That pretty much describes the reasons for punishment in our dynamic too... Asha hates punishing me. He'd rather find another more effective way of dealing with issues as they come up, but if nothing else works and the behavior continues despite anything else he says or does... then punishment is inevitable.

Thankfully I don't often get to that point. Usually having him point out my behavior is enough.

*hugs*

turiya

mouse said...

BiancaSmith -- thank you! What a wonderful compliment!

turiya -- Pointing out the behavior is the first and often the last problem mouse has. Omega really likes to discuss behavior rather than just punish.

Hugs,
mouse