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Friday, April 15, 2011

Homecoming

Good morning,

The past couple days around here have been a little tense (which has nothing to do with the impending remodel).

Swallowing the bitter pill of no led to some stiff coolness from mouse.  Naturally, she does her duty, cares for Master but not with zest.  Don't want to say it's like going through the motions...because that's not it either.  Just maybe a bit frosty.  His needs are met, she offers herself freely, but something's missing. Passion maybe?  Daddy knew this would happen when he handed down his no.  He knew mouse would be disappointed.

The "no" hung in the air, like after cooking fish, the smell of it just hangs around.  It was decided nothing more to do about it, nothing more to consider.  No more arguing or venting and it was time to just let it go.   There would be no last minute reprieves or presidential pardons.  The no was final.

In the evening mouse looked around at all she accomplished, quite a lot for not having much to do  and found that kinda odd as she prepared the evening meal.  When Daddy came home and walked into the kitchen he asked if mouse would join him upstairs for a few minutes.  He closed the bedroom door and left mouse feeling kinda perplexed, for a moment she wondered if he had changed his mind.

He kissed mouse's lips and of course she fell into him, tumbling and churning and she didn't realize until she was on her knees before him and he was filling her mouth with him.  Immediately the urge to balk came, followed by the thought to relax let it happen...Everything at once burned in her mind, her place, her purpose.  Everything in those moments fell into place as the minutes clicked by mouse was lost in her service to her Daddy.

Swallowing his gifts are much easier, much nicer.

The sting of no has diminished, lost some of its power.  Or perhaps, as newtothislife07 suggested, the batteries have just been replaced or recharged.

4 comments:

Unknown said...

Been a rough couple days for you mouse, I sympathize. I'm glad you found your batteries back in place =)

Alice said...

"No" can be really really difficult to swallow at times. Especially so when it's to something we really want, really desire, and often in that case the "no" seems... unthinking, unconsidered, unwarranted. I find myself saying, "but you don't understand!" or "this is totally unfair!" and trying all these different angles of "pitching" my want to Chess, and still the answer is "no". It's hard to explain the emotion that comes with that denial. Perhaps a bit like a child being denied candy. I want to scream and throw a fit because obviously he doesn't understand that I NEED this. The thing is, he's often right. It takes a while before I can let go of it and admit that, and apologize, but 99% of the time he's right to say no (I hate that!).

HUGS

Alice

turiya said...

Wow... turi has a much harder time swallowing "no"... but glad you've been able to make peace with it.

*hugs*

turiya

agog said...

sending *hugs* to you. I can't really add anything useful from what has already been said, but I think we've all been there.