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Friday, August 31, 2012

You Love the Thunder

We had a show other night. A thunder storm rolled in. Babygirl, perched by the window squealed with delight when the lightning flashed lighting up the sky, illuminating everything for a few seconds. Then nothing...several more seconds passed, while Babygirl waited, then a distant clap of thunder, the sound rolling delicately across the sky and she'd clap along with excitement and approval, while the dog barked.

Way off in the distance it repeated, the dog tried to position himself between Babygirl and the mean sound, but she's determined not to miss out. He'd nudge her onto her bottom and she'd pull herself back up, fingers on the window, face pressed against the glass. Daddy was seated on a chair, and would look up watching her. He didn't say anything, his finger tapping against the side of the book he was reading, eyes darting between Babygirl, the book and a nervous mouse. He was keeping an eye out, had the storm been moving closer he certainly would have closed the shutters.

Eventually the storm continued moving further away from us, the only thing seen was the distant flashes like a camera. Then we saw it, Babygirl yawned...Daddy looked to mouse and nodded. No quarrel was made, Babygirl nuzzled mouse's shoulder as we made our way up the stairs. We did the bedtime routine and she curled up with her little plush frog.

Returning downstairs, mouse found Daddy in his study. He was seated on the sofa still reading his book. He invited mouse to sit beside him -- feeling herself being pulled to him (mentally), mouse unbuttoned her blouse and settled beside him. We stayed like that for a little while, but soon enough Daddy said we should go to bed.

Upstairs, Daddy undressed, then undressed mouse, applied the clamps and told her to kneel; he held her hands together, binding them together with his tie and pressed her head to him. Daddy took his time, controlling mouse with his hands. Now most people who have read this blog for a whole know mouse loves pleasuring Daddy orally. Each morning mouse wakes him that way (at least more often than not). There have been times mouse has slept with him either inside or at least close to her mouth and that gives her joy. Truth be told, she's even pleasured him while he's slept not to bring him to orgasm or to even wake him, but just to give him sweet, sexy dreams.

This however, with the clamps applied, hands tied, and the slow pace, had mouse in tears. Everything was hurting. Tears were streaming down her cheeks and she was drooling, profusely. He murmured, in a low intense tone how beautiful mouse looked.

Seriously?! Oh dear mouse was a complete mess! How on earth could he find that the least bit attractive? It didn't empower mouse, or cause her any kind of feelings of pride. Truthfully and quite honestly, mouse just wanted him to hurry up and finish. When the tears turned to sobs and gulps he repeated it.

Finally after who knows how long -- at least an hour longer than it should have been -- his body tensed, and honestly, mouse was happy...it was nearly over. But he wasn't. Who knows what he does or how he does it...maybe he thinks of dead kittens or something, but he didn't come. It kept going...

He led mouse two more times the same way, each time it made mouse feel like this torment would NEVER end! When he finally did finish, mouse was a sobbing, sweat-covered mess. Then he told her to meditate. Was there no end???

The sobs and tears had no effect, honestly, mouse hasn't a clue how she got through the mantra about being a slave and her purpose to serve him -- how his pleasure was her pain and discomfort and she is for him. Now, at the time, they were simply words she uttered, rushing somewhat to be done. His voice and tone caught her off guard...

"We have all night mouse."

There was this disembodied cry that came from nowhere, and it took several moments for mouse to realize it came from her. The cry hung in her head, rattling in her ears...clear yet unfamiliar. Resignation. Slumping to the floor, her forehead firmly planted inches from his feet, her breasts feeling tormented from their own weight and the pressure of the clamps. Succumbing and feeling the wave of emotion...as the words she spoke rang through her head. Everything seemed to roll into one and soon Daddy was gathering mouse into his arms and removed the clamps and mouse just crumpled into goo in his arms. Everything felt alive, except her mind devoid and empty of thought,

In bed, wrapped in his arms, his body snaked protectively surrounding hers, mouse whispered to him thanks. Deep inside mouse was grateful to him for having her go into the dark and bringing her back to her purpose. Slowly, peacefully mouse drifted off thinking of her mantra and the man she worships and calls Daddy.

Thursday morning, mouse woke and pleasured Daddy with her mouth, but he had other ideas, turning her over and entering her from behind, his fist full of her hair, pulling her back. Sloppy, wet and driven to distraction mouse let go...

After we showered, mouse went downstairs to begin breakfast for the family, with Babygirl in tow. Our routine is to get her settled with some Cheerios for entertainment, while mouse cooks. Cooked some oatmeal, scrambled some eggs and sliced some pears for us (well most of us, kiddo was still alseep -- determined to enjoy the final days of summer vacation). Daddy made up mouse's todo list for the day.

As mouse moved through the day, her thoughts kept returning to that previous night. By the time Daddy got home from work, mouse was full of warm fuzzy feelings, driven by this deep feeling of submission. He walked through the door and mouse kissed him passionately...then helped him off with his suit jacket and loosened his tie. Got him started on a small appetizer and beverage, while mouse took his shoes off, then hurried to finish dinner.

Dinner consisted of a vegetable soup course, the main course for Daddy of baked mahi mahi (which came out perfect) and asparagus. Fresh berries cooked down with a little honey, lemon rind and juice, cinnamon and a tiny punch of cayenne pepper, served over low fat ricotta, flavored with a little espresso. Even kiddo liked it. Babygirl ate mostly the veggies from the soup and a little bit of fish. At almost 9 months she's really off all baby food...just a few fruits, she likes mixed with other stuff. Whatever we eat, is what she wants...tho she still loves to nurse, that's become more of a snack.

Once getting the messy one settled for the night, mouse returned to Daddy in his study and her body was on fire wishing he'd use her. That came much later, after he finished his work for the night and by that time mouse thought she might lose her mind!

He watched her do her rituals, which left mouse to wonder if he could feel the warmth she was feeling, as she did them. He used the cuffs, holding her body open and telling her to be still. Tears formed as he entered her, her body betraying her and yeilding to his use, despite how desperately she wanted to touch him. He told her not to orgasm and she cried out in resignation. Soon be had finished, uncuffed her and told her how pleased he was with her.

Later mouse was allowed to share her thoughts, as horrible as she felt the other night pleasuring him orally for all that time...how badly she hated him while it was happening...now...later...she wanted to do again. Tears fell with that admission, even now being denied an orgasm -- no matter how badly she wanted it -- the tsunami of her slavery was palpable. How could that make her feel so sexy? So thoroughly complete?

Song selection: You Love the Thunder; Jackson Browne

13 comments:

Michael Samadhi said...

Oh that is absolutely delicious . . . and the phrase - "the tsunami of her slavery was palpable" is without a doubt the best descriptive phrase I've read in . . . I don't know how long. Inspiring!

monkey girl said...

Aww mouse, that was just lovely!!
But the "dead kittens" comment was just too much(I almost choked on my granola!) I've often wondered whether this is true, cause H just can just go FOREVER. Now don't get me wrong I love it, but come on!! Sometimes I wish I knew what he(and now Omega) was thinking.
Have a wonderful labor day weekend!
Hugs,
mg

Advizor54 said...

I am so torn by your experiences. At times I hate him for what he does to you, the denial, the tears, but when you write so lovingly about him, about the pain, about the catharsis, I'm at a loss.

Anonymous said...

Still amazes me how there are times we don't know our needs and they (tops) seem to instictively. I refuse to believe that everything is thought out just the important stuff lol.

Storm said...

"how badly she hated him while it was happening...now...later...she wanted to do again."

I love that you wrote this. Because that's how I felt a couple of nights ago. And I found it rather confusing...

Anyways, I really liked this post.
Thank you.

Anti-Mom said...

Dear mouse&omega's. I have been reading your blog only for about 3 weeks, and find your writing so evocative, educational, beautiful, and disturbing. This last post was particularly hard for me to read and digest, but thank you for being so open about your punishments, as well as your cherished moments ( although...this punishment seems to also be a cherished moment) ;). I was wondering how omega feels seeing yours tears, and reding bout how much you hate some of the things he does....if you would be so kind....

mouse said...

Thank you Sir! Daddy actually liked that particular phrasing also.

Hugs,
mouse

mouse said...

Mg,

Really haven't a clue what he thinks about either...

Yes, mouse knows what you mean tho.

Hugs,
mouse

mouse said...

Sir,

Thanks for your comment. Sometimes mouse is confused by it too....but the release that sometimes happens is just incredible.

Hugs,
mouse

mouse said...

Mindset,

Yes! It's amazing how they seem to understand it all.

Hugs,
mouse

mouse said...

lil,

Honestly it's something that mouse has said more times than she would care to admit. It's so hard sometimes to be in that place. And later to admit it to them that yes you liked it...oh goodness!

Hugs,
mouse

mouse said...

Anti-mom,

First of all, welcome. Daddy, for the most part probably like most men, finds tears sometimes perplexing. It's really a complex subject because mouse cries for a variety of reasons (probably like most women). He doesn't mind if it's cause because of pain he's inflicting. He understands the pain he inflicts can be for the most part mild compared to what we used to do. He likes it when mouse gets all hot and bothered to the point of tears. He doesn't mind it. Now, if he causes the tears because he was careless or thoughtless in some way...that's entirely different. He hates those tears, he never wants to hurt mouse that way or cause her undo pain or stress. It's rare that it happens, but he'll do whatever is right to make it right.

Of course, we've had arguments where he's made mouse cry -- again that's totally different.

When tears fall because she's watching a drippy sad movie, his reaction is typical male. He understands happy tears and sad ones.

The one thing that truly perplexes him, and probably makes him uncomfortable, is when at times mouse will cry while we make love or right after...to be moved to that highly emotional state...he doesn't get that at all. He accepts it and knows there's nothing really wrong....but he really doesn't know what to do with it.

Hope that helps answer your questions.

Hugs,
mouse

thequeenofHiscastle said...

Thank you for sharing this. I do not really understand how those bad feelings lead to such good ones. But they do for me as well.