Well, Good Morning!
It has been a long time since mouse last posted. Finally, some things to write about. Life is good and filled with everything life should be filled with. There's this contentment that mouse feels now each day. To say it's a nice feeling is an understatement. It's incredible.
Recently Master treated mouse to an evening out. We got dressed in our nice clothes and went out without kids and distractions. Master told mouse, while in the car, to keep her eyes on him throughout the evening and if she was good girl she would get a surprise. Over dinner mouse clearly heard the rattle of chains playing musically in her head as he guided mouse to our table. He took her menu and handed it back to the person seating us, "The lady will not require this."
After Master ordered dinner for us, we talked a little about the expectations and pleased he's been with mouse in taking extra care to follow them. Inside mouse just shined with feelings of joy.
Our food arrived and Master offered permission for mouse to begin eating, during that time the conversation more or less stopped, aside from asking about the food. Master likes to know that mouse is enjoying the meal, but he wants to know if it's not very good. Actually the meal was wonderful.
It was still early so we walked around a little after the meal, stopping into a book store and then popping into a dessert place to pick up some sweets for the kids on our way home. Inside the bookstore Master looked through some biographies that he would find of interest while mouse more or less milled around but never once took her eyes off him for more than a second.
After, buying the book Master wanted and stopping at the sweet shop, we decided to take a detour through a small park on our way to the garage. After making sure no one was around (it was quite late by that time) Master had mouse kneel on the cool grass in front of him. He remarked how lovely she looked with just the light of the moon. A picture of submission. Then he helped mouse up and we walked back to the car.
"Tell me, how did you feel displaying your submission to me in a public setting?" Master asked as he drove out of the parking area and onto the street.
After a moment mouse admitted that she hadn't thought of it as a public display, we were alone, sure it was a public area but there wasn't lots of people around.
"If I asked in the bookstore?"
With a voice just above a whisper, it might have been embarrassing.
"Even if you were just looking at me?" Master asked softly.
This is the new challenge to not worry about what others might be thinking and just let mouse be who she is, regardless of the setting. If kneeling is appropriate, mouse should feel no shame in doing so. Of course, there are few places where kneeling is appropriate, but it's the overall mindset he wishes to alter.
Going along with these thoughts instead of beginning a new post that is unclear that mouse will or not actually post; things have been really good of late. It seems at long last mouse has finally understood what her slavery is about and what it's not about. It's only about Master and His wishes and not what others do or don't as part of their dynamic. Coming to terms with this has led to far more introspective mouse on many topics. It's not that she doesn't have her thoughts but it's more that she doesn't feel the need or desire to share them.
One of her more controversial "expectations" reads as follows: mouse will admit she does not watch the news or keep up with current events. This doesn't mean that she doesn't "hear" about news, because she does but it means that most news stories are filtered through Master. He doesn't offer a slant to it. An example might be the news recently about what occurred in Las Vegas which mouse learned about through Twitter and heard about while running errands. A simple text to Master, which he replied, "there was a shooting from high up in Mandalay Bay hotel on Sunday evening on a music festival that left 58 people dead and injured more than 500. The shooter is dead but not counted."
So from his text reply mouse got the who, what, where, when and how, but no why. When she asked about why, his reply was "It is unknown at this time." When she asked again, a few days later his response was the same. He doesn't speculate (as mouse has seen others do), but repeats things he knows to be true based on evidence. If a reason for the bloodshed is uncovered he will let mouse know. The other bit of news of that day was just as sad to mouse. Master came home and said, "Tom Petty has died, or is dying. He suffered a heart attack and is on life support. There was some confusion earlier with news outlets reporting his passing prematurely but there is little hope for a recovery."
Music has always been very important to mouse, it's always on in our home, in the car, and it keeps mouse feeling centered when the world is going mad. Tom Petty (and The Heartbreakers) were part of mouse's soundtrack. He never lost his relevant edge, when others were doing their greatest hits tours, Tom Petty was still making fresh music that went along with the time.
For right now, before mouse closes, she would like send some loving thoughts to the people of Northern California (her home state and especially her former hometown). Stay strong, be smart and stay safe. The only thing you can't really replace is yourself. Everything else, while it might take work, can be replaced.
Goodnight friends,
mouse
Hi Mouse, it's so great to see you post! So glad to hear things are going so well. What a wonderful evening out together and kneeling in the park must have felt like a special moment between you.
ReplyDeleteInteresting question, how would you have felt kneeling in the store. Not worrying about what others may think is not easy and you're right, it's about what works for you, not what others do or don't do.
Very sad news about Tom Petty.
Hugs
Roz
Huge hugs and love to you, mouse. So lovely to see you pop up ;-)
ReplyDeleteSo good to hear that you are doing well. What a fun evening.
ReplyDeleteVery good advice at the end, Mouse. True for everyone experiencing these crazy hurricanes, fires, floods, and earthquakes. Take care.
ReplyDeleteAmy
That moment in the park was beautiful. If it were more public, I would have freaked out... but I think this revelation you're having is a good thing. One I don't think I could have, but it is beautiful in its simplicity. You are his, plain and simple.
ReplyDelete