Omega was working, well reading something, and I was watching a little TV when he suddenly told me to kneel at his feet. He's never really made a request like that, and with the way he said it, it was like he was asking for a glass of water. In an odd way it excited me. He switched off the tv and just left me kneeling in front of him while he read. I remained still just looking forward occasionally raising my eyes but for most part staring straight ahead, waiting for him to say something else.
- In time we hate that which we often fear.
After a while Omega got up off the sofa, called to the dog that it was time for bed. He turned off the light and left the room. Yes! I was still kneeling there. I didn't know what to do. Do I say something like, "hello, you forgot me!" Should I ask permission to get up? He got to the first landing on the stairs and paused, calling to me, "you too mouse, bedtime."
I scrambled off the floor, and went up the stairs where he was now waiting at the top. He went to my drawer and picked out a long cotton nightgown and told me to wear that to bed. I was kinda surprised, even though it's very comfortable to wear in the summertime. He instructed me to unbutton the top, and raise the bottom part up before getting into bed. Again I was curiously aroused by this. Not in a someone "normal" would be aroused but in my own strange way. Normally I lay down on my side and snuggle against him. He told me to lay on my back and he touched me in several places. When he touched me down there, he smiled. I wanted to die. He started touching me and I couldn't help myself. It wasn't bad, it felt nice -- good. (I thought we had already done our work for the night) I squirmed in spite of myself. The room wasn't spinning but I was feeling odd, tingling, warm all over. Not in the bad-I'm-gunna-be-sick way but a nice way. I've never felt like that before (at least that I can remember). I didn't say anything, I just trembled and wriggled a little but I also didn't count down the minutes until he was finished either.
Later he pulled me close to him and held me. I started crying (often I don't know how to react so I cry). The tears didn't last long though. Secretly, I don't think I wanted him to stop.
***Next time I will try to say something***