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Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Being the bottom to his Top

The yin to his Yang, or whatever you want to call it. He calls it the opposite sides of the same coin. I like that too. Whatever you call it, we have it. Omega rocks my world, he makes it better. I think I make his world fun.

He's so even all the time, nothing rattles and if it does you'd never know it. I do though I see it and always have, with that one finger on his hand that never obeys him. It taps furiously when he's upset or annoyed. I doubt he's ever been aware of it, but I am. Last night, his finger was out of control, tapping against the book, the papers, and anything else it could find to beat against.

I watched the rhythm of that finger and then started humming to myself, but he glanced up so not amused. I lowered my eyes and he returned his attentions away from me and back to his reading. Soon enough, the finger was tapping again. I watched a silent concert directed by his finger (and he says he lacks any type of real musical talent) play inside my head, my mind drifting in and out around a song. Soon my eyes were closed, my head was moving and I was mentally lost in a song. Was his finger moving? I dunno, I was listening to music playing in my head! Suddenly somewhere above the mental music I heard a booming voice, "MOUSE--What are you doing?"

I stopped, the music vanished, and I was left alone. I again lowered my eyes to him. Could I actually explain I was listening to the song Na Na Hey Hey Kiss Him Goodbye and Everlasting Love play in my head? Nope. That's a little too nutty even for me.

I think my playfulness wore off on him, or I was just driving him to the point of distraction, but soon after he put the book down and told me it was time for bed.

We did our thing and soon I was wiggling and then he did the unthinkable. He stopped. Just stopped. I liked what he was doing very much. I asked him if there was anything wrong, and he assured me no, he just was tired and wanted to sleep.

He pulled me close to his chest like he does each night and I told him how much I enjoy that now.

"That is good mouse, it will make a nice reward for your good behavior."

As I snuggled against him it occurred to me while I've always accepted Omega's harsher touch and rough play, I'm a bit greedy for his tender touches as well. This is adding a whole new level to my life that I never anticipated having.


6 comments:

  1. How lovely, mouse. That you can enjoy now the softer side of the equiation is huge and so beautiful.

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  2. I can relate to the nutty thoughts I decide it is best to keep to myself ;-} I'm with you on that one. Some subspace thinking just doesn't sound good when verbalized.

    My wife has a end of the day reward for me where she pulls on my pajamas as a signal for me to draw closer to her as she falls asleep. To be close to her warmth and to have her hand and arm draped down my side are a way I can serve her one last time that day, acting as a sort of teddy bear for her to drift into sleep with. I really look forward to the nights she does that, also because sometimes she purposely excites me to get me aroused before sleep time as one more authority reinforcer. It is only when I have been on good behavior though that she treats me.

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  3. Somehow I have to think that it feels so good to him too.

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  4. *laughs* I can picture you sitting there, swaying with the music while Omega is staring at you in bewilderment.

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  5. I understand just what you mean about needing and wanting that softer side...once I realized it was as important I was better able to accept it.

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  6. Everyone...

    Yup I'm a crazy woman at times...LOL. I think Omega must be destined for sainthood or something for putting up with some of my weirdness.

    s-h,
    Most nights Master pulls me close but if he doesn't that means I'm in trouble.

    mouse

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