Like a Door that Keeps Revolving

There was a time, not so very long ago this blog had purpose. It was a place where mouse could share her thoughts safely with Daddy and if it hoped someone else, well that was great. It was about life -- mouse's life, thoughts, feelings, worries, joys, and sorrows.

Today there is not a thought put down that Daddy doesn't know about beforehand. The way we communicate is so much improved, mouse at least with him has lost the ability to edit or filter her thoughts. Daddy is very old school when it comes to certain things. He's certainly a throwback to a generation long gone. He loves a good martini and jazz. He'd rather listen to Sinatra. He wears a hat. He's comfortable that way.

It's funny in 2011 mouse was laid off her job, and decided to be a stay-at-home mother to our children; one or two of her friends blamed Daddy and his antiquated ways. They took mouse aside and questioned if she wasn't doing this because he wanted her "barefoot in the kitchen." Really they made it seem as though, by not putting our daughter in daycare and running back to work that somehow mouse was hurting womanhood. If anything feminism has taught mouse is that women can be anything! Including a stay-at-home wife, mother and slave! It doesn't diminish what mouse is, or her potential in the least and we're fortunate enough that it's a choice we could afford.  Still triggers are unsuspecting things, you just never know when one will strike.  When the past will cough up a hairball that sends  mouse into a tizzy.  But when it does happen now, mouse wastes no time discussing it with Daddy and that's a good thing.  

Recently, Daddy asked mouse to take up a hobby (he believes all slaves should have a quiet hobby) Something that she can do easily when the housework is complete and children have gone to bed. Guess we can say cocksucking wasn't the kind of hobby he had in mind. Though he certainly wouldn't have put up a huge fight had mouse suggested it. No, he wanted her to do something that wouldn't involve servicing him -- something mouse could do while she waits to serve him.

As a child, mouse was enthralled by her great-grandmother's crocheting. The beautiful doilies she'd create, each a small work of art in the most ugly colors (it was the orange and avocado green era after all). But mouse although eager to learn had absolutely zero aptitude for it. Great-grandma then sighed and suggested knitting. Now, knitting did seem a little easier, but mouse didn't stick with it.

So, mouse decided to try knitting again as her hobby. And with images of gorgeous cable-knitt sweaters in her head, mouse began. Slowly, teaching herself from a book -- a great book with lots of pictures on how to knitt -- some things remembered from when great-grandma tried to teach mouse as a kid. Then reality set in....

Let's be honest, she's not very good -- sure she might be able to do a scarf but her BabyGirl would be in college before it was finished! But it gives her something to do with her hands that's different and mentally relaxing. There are "holes" where she knitted a row too tightly followed by a looser one....but it doesn't really matter much to mouse. Because its really practice.

Of course that practice might continue forever and mouse will never do more than a simple scarf. Or maybe just a bookmark!

Song selection: Windmills of Your Mind