The Winter Routine

"Comes the lightning of the sun
On bright unfocused eyes
The blue of yet another day
A springtime wet with sighs
A hopeful candle lingers..."

We have lots of snow, so much it makes getting "out" difficult. Getting into town to collect our mail, which is now done weekly if possible. Grocery shopping are saved for the days between. Tuesday last was a glorious day, bright, sunny and just made you feel as light as could ever be. The sun so bright it blinded especially with that crisp white backdrop. Millions of stars filled the night's sky, until the clouds rolled in and the gray returned. 

We didn't waste any time, getting up that morning we showered and dressed quickly for the day. Master set to work clearing the driveway, while mouse prepared breakfast for everyone. Spinach omelette for Master and slave, oatmeal with dried fruit and frozen blueberries for the children. The breakfast table set, the morning music courtesy of Electric Light Orchestra -- Mr Blue Sky, had everyone tapping their feet. The slave slipped the pre-packed lunches into the girls book bags and then heard the horn of the school bus approach to its stop by the main road. 

No time for playing around (normally, after the house was empty, Master would have slave remove her bathrobe, suck His cock under the table and follow the instructions to rub vigorously her own clit but not to any conclusion for her). Master was grabbing the breakfast basket full of bread, rolls and whatever else mouse had made the precious days and pulled on His boots, saying He'd be back soon, hopefully with eggs. His sibling who lives quite close (roughly a half mile away-- maybe longer) and keeps chickens. Without a lot of fanfare, mouse murmured a quick "be careful on that footbridge Sir," and gave Him a quick kiss. Breakfast table was quickly cleared, dishes washed up, and tidied when He returned with 4 dozen eggs, which mouse divided by size. Smaller eggs are saved for meals, larger eggs are divided up for baking and the largest ones are usually hard-boiled. We know they were all recently collected so after they're washed up and placed in cartons we just reuse, mouse put on her coat and grabbed her extensive shopping list. 

He was finishing up His coffee but didn't linger over it, the way He'd normally do. He walked out to the SUV and started it up, warming it, while mouse double checked the list and freezer. This was going to be a huge haul since we haven't gotten out for a while. After deciding the best use of the time, Master drove to our first stop. After the third stop, we stopped for a quick lunch, before continuing. We had in all three boxes and 8 bags filled with groceries. We do not want to think about how much every item costs. 

Then when we returned home, came the unloading and then arranging into preparation groups. Fresh veggies are washed and prepped. Some are frozen for easy meals, others are prepped into containers in the fridge. Meats are portioned out, wrapped, labeled and put into the freezer. It usually takes a couple hours to get everything restocked and organized. Nothing is wasted anymore, bottoms of celery, herbs, whatever are tossed into a bag and used for stocks. Same with chicken bones, placed in a special bag and frozen until mouse needs more chicken stock or wants to make a soup.  

Notes are made about laundry to do (for the next day). Master went down to collect our mail and pay any bills. We accomplish much, and then time for a break before the school bus returns. Master in His chair motions for slave. who kneels and crawls to Him. Removing His boots, kissing His feet. Feeling her own want, as she makes her way up His legs to His cock and kissing its tip before sucking the head. Soon her mouth is full of Him, and she feels His hands guiding it further toward her throat. If she chokes, it's only because He wishes her to and He wants her to be slobbery, because there were lots of deep thrusts. Down there her pussy because wet and her clit throbs but this isn't about her. It's all about Master and somehow that just makes her want Him all the more. 

Eagerly she swallows the ropes of thick cum without the benefit of tasting or savoring Master's flavor. His cock is too far down her throat and she feels like a sword swallower in a circus. After mouse crawls off and get's a towel to clean off Master of her drool and washing His shaft with her tongue. Then she kneels before Him with her head lowered, awaiting a word. Dismissed, she rises and walks to the bathroom to clean herself up as she can hear the school bus. Within minutes the front door bursts open and the house is filled with noisy chatter. Suddenly, mouse regrets that she didn't beg Master to use the belt on her anything to quell the throbbing going on down below. Dinner is already prepped and it's an easy meal (Costco Chickens, mashed potatoes, fresh green beans, salad), so all that's left might be a treat for dessert. Master cuts up the chicken and mouse cooks everything else. After dinner the women folk clear the table, while Master enjoys a cup of coffee and cigar on the porch. The rest of the evening mouse is in the kitchen, either cleaning up, ironing, or knitting while the dishwasher runs. In the den area the girls are quietly reading until bedtime, as is Master. It's nice because the kitchen is also the warmest room in the house so mouse can remain in her bare feet. Before the girls go to bed, they say goodnight to mouse and we chat a little about their lunches for the next day. Left over chicken, garlic naan, hummus, veggies, fruit, and a thermos of soup are on their menu.  

The lunch boxes are placed in the fridge and finally the light is turned off.  At Master's feet, He instructs her to get ready for bed, so off she goes. Undressing, drawing a bath and washes trying to not pay any mind to her throbbing sex. Master enters just as she's nearly finished bathing. He inspects His slave quickly, surely making note of her clit and slick wetness. He rubs it with a finger and when He notes His slave becomes greedy He takes it away. In the bedroom, He has mouse present her hands and He binds them, then slips the dog collar around her neck, He said she was a bad girl for rubbing her sex on His fingers (no, He's not really mad, but never misses an opportunity to remind His slave where her place truly is). He tethers her to the wall, watches as she curls up on the huge dog cushion and covers her with a blanket. Hearing His footfalls and the sounds of bed as He climbs in, moving around the pillows. Sleep is complicated for her, as she contemplates gratitude. It seems odd. At some point during the night she feels Him uncovering her and unbinding her hands and then the collar is removed. Sleepily she waits, then she hears Him say, "come". In bed He uses her like a pillow, cautioning her to get all mischievous.

Welcoming 2023

Where to begin? It's been so long since mouse thought or considered updating, yet a few days ago there was an invisible pull to return to this precious space. So many changes over the course the last part of year. Guess that bullet points are the way to go so here's a list of changes. Some might be expanded upon later in this post, or in future posts (hey, we are planning on posting again). 

• Everyone is FINE! 
• We moved to the country -- Big change
• We left Twitter! 
• Master retired (like for real)

We had an opportunity we really couldn't refuse but it took a long time to even think about moving, getting the new digs the way we needed it to be and a whole lot of sweat equity. We hired contractors to do the really heavy stuff, but all the cosmetic work was done by us. We're proud of our hard work. It's been a big change. We still have too much stuff, so the plan is to only keep what we really want/need or is too sentimental to consider letting go. Master is very handy to have around. He's been patiently mudding and taping the walls that still require that. It's been difficult, living surrounded by a cloud of dust, evoking memories of "Pigpen" from the Peanuts gang. Recently, while knitting by the fire, Master was doing His sanding, when He got a text message, then mouse's phone alerted her that He was texting. It simply read, "Jeff Beck passed." instead of replying, mouse yelled "NOOOOOOO" Then quickly head to Google hoping for a mistake or error, but no, it was long confirmed. It still leaves mouse feeling a bit unnerved. But that might be best served with another post at some point. 

We're surviving winter (though it's been a lot harder than we expected, including a record snow fall that 'locals' claim never happens (almost, because it happened last year too, albeit later). The California girl is adapting -- slowly. Autumn was wonderful and we had so much fun (we were moving in) getting ready for the coming winter, which meant mouse learning new skills. Of course, Master is on hand to help her better arrange her days. Odd, but we're not so far out, it's not like the lake where we an hour or more from the nearest town. Here, we're probably about 15-25 minutes from nice grocery stores, big box warehouse, and Target. Oh! And the ever important Dom Depot is probably around 35 minutes from us. 

Master is finding new ways to torture His slave. Since retiring the house projects thankfully have been keeping Him occupied but the terrible weather stalled the work plans, so it's a bit like the lockdown. We're all together -- all the time. Again, mouse has tried to knit and managed to make Him a scarf that will someday be completed when she figures out how to end it. It's true, she doesn't know how to stop. Don't worry, it's not too long...Yet! 

One morning, mouse emerged from the bedroom in search of coffee, Master had been up for hours already (He had issues slowing down immediately following His retirement) and announced, "I have deactivated our Twitter accounts and deleted the app from our devices." Then He added, "I removed the passwords, so we will not be tempted to return." He was rather glaring at mouse when He said the last bit, which instantly made her feel guilty. Somewhere in the middle of the second cup of coffee mouse finally said, "Did you say something about Twitter?" A friend always called it 'Pre-coffee Brain' and mouse finds that an apt term. 

To be clear, He decided it was time to leave it and determined that if He wasn't going to be on Twitter, neither could mouse. It made sense but she felt bad not being able to say goodbye. 

Blogging hasn't been something mouse has been thinking a lot about, maybe in part because we've been very busy -- obviously there's been a lot going on. Also, mouse worries that there isn't a lot to say. Our relationship is idyllic, in fact it's been better than ever. Well maybe that's an overstatement, but we seem to moving more as an unit, rather than mouse feeling like she's always got to scramble to keep up or be what He needs her to be. He's still the scary Dom He's always been, but He just wants things the way He wants them and refuses to compromise His lofty ideals. 

The Checklist

 

Do you find the act of checking off an accomplishment cathartic? Some people do, while others find it a waste of time. Some go so far as to check off "Get up" meaning they got out of bed in the morning. That feels like a bit much but if it works for you, who is mouse to argue? There are things however, that Master felt a list would be helpful for her to do. While writing exercise isn't an issue because she'd never forget that she does frequently forget to be gentle with herself and take a moment and meditate. When Master constructed a todo list for His slave, He took into account things she should be doing such as, household chores, which vary daily, shopping, errands, etc., He added the aforementioned meditation but more surprisingly He also added that she's to "Read for 10 minutes" that's a minimum requirement, reading longer is encouraged but He knows that she's busy. This is a reminder that all things are important and even taking the quiet moment to breathe deeply, arrange some flowers, or read for 10 minutes, have a purpose in mental health. As a slave, the day is organized a certain way, with a repeating theme while Master is away from the home. The slave is driven by her list in His absence, sure some things are easier like being allowed to run the day's errands or showering and things that are to be accomplished without His supervision. Meals are planned for with His guidance, and for now, honestly driven by what we can get on sale. We understand we're privileged afford good quality meats and produce. We aim for zero waste but it's not easy since children are fickle. 

When at Home, mouse is thoroughly tethered to Him, if she's cooking in the kitchen, she will frequently check in on Him to see if His glass needs refilling, or whatever He might need. The children are kept occupied with either studies, or helping prepare dinner. Their job is to set the table and help clean up after it. With all the complaining and bickering mouse often worries that we're nothing but a bunch of ungrateful females. Taking a moment to think about others has become a daily thing. 

The children are to do something for Him, something for mouse and something for another person (doesn't matter who) or what is done. Each night our daughter will ask if there is anything she can do to help mouse with dinner. Even if the answer is no, she will offer to do something small (like ask permission to make an appetizer) or to make dessert. Of course, this can also create more work for mouse, like getting a cutting board and veggies set up or passing her ingredients to make a dip and they've gotten very good at putting together a charcuterie board (not a huge thing, although mouse is pretty sure they could), but a small board with different types of nibbles for mostly their Father to enjoy. 

Kindness costs nothing, we keep seeing this message everywhere but, we still see so many being unkind. Master has, with that in mind, cut us all off from social media. There's too much smugness and self-righteousness in the world, He doesn't believe any of us need to be exposed to. In just a few weeks the attitude began lifting. Now, to be clear we are speaking of social media and influencers (regardless of where they stand on the political spectrum). This isn't to be confused with unaware, we read news articles from sources that we trust and teaching our children to parse the opinion from the facts. The current rule being if one doesn't know all the facts, one has no business spouting any opinion. Offer deference and move on with your day because those types aren't worth any effort. 

Sorry this so brief, mouse will return to discuss how the slavery side of things factors into this. 

Much love dear friends. 

So Far Away

Master came home in a mood, a meeting a rare face to face meeting hadn't gone as planned and Master had to travel. He wasn't thrilled about this but said very little about it. He didn't watch as mouse took out His case and began to pack for Him. He wouldn't be flying, instead He would make a long drive (thankfully, He really doesn't mind driving). His case was packed with the usual dress suit, a few extra shirts and ties, and casual clothing He would need for the trip. It seemed a lot of effort He would never consider for a meeting that would only last a few hours. 

That evening He had mouse on her knees on the chaise lounge and took her from behind, He reached the spot between her legs, and told her to rub her clit. His hand over hers as she rubbed it, while being rutted from behind was overwhelming. Permission was granted to orgasm and she cried as she came. Then He pushed her hand away and manipulated the tender clit until she came again as He exploded into her cunt, leaving her feeling marked by Him. When He noticed a few drops on the chaise, Master had her clean it by licking it up. 

The following morning He loaded His suitcase, told mouse to be a good girl. He looked over the lunch she had packed for Him to enjoy on the road and thanked her. No thanks was needed but she accepted it graciously. It was dark still when He departed and mouse watched until His taillights vanished before returning to the house which suddenly felt empty. He left no devices for her waste time with. The iPad, laptop remained locked but she had access to the phone which she carried with her so she was sure to not miss a text or call from Him. Master hadn't said He would call from the road but she was hopeful He would. 

Of course she wasn't alone, in a really empty house, instead the house was full of morning excitement that He was missing (and to be honest probably glad for it). By noontime, He had phoned and mouse felt better. He was making excellent time. It seemed almost silly but mouse felt such a pang of misery because He sounded happy and she was sad without Him. As mouse cleaned she thought (and she knows she's not supposed to do that) about how different she is now. How much Master has really changed her in the best of ways, her mind is so much settled, focus is greatly improved, of course He is the center of her universe. A cold chill ran down her spine, her mind went dark, and those horrible "what ifs" played in her head. Was this what death is like? 

It sounds silly but while it's not expressly forbidden Master prefers that mouse not pester Him a lot. If He has a meeting outside the home she isn't to bother Him. If He contacts her then it's fine, but not really the other way around. As mouse can attest, it's annoying to get a text message while driving. Still these thoughts wouldn't leave her and she fired off a text to Him that she more or less instantly regretted. He called a few minutes later. He was fine, and as we spoke she calmed down, only to ramp up the moment we got off the phone. 

Long after dinner He phoned again saying He had arrived and was settling into His hotel. He didn't regret in the least making this long drive. That evening mouse fell asleep hugging His pillow wearing nothing but one of His old tee-shirts and feeling silly while doing it. His meetings the following day went well. He could hear the stress in mouse's tone and assured her He was doing well. He led her through some breathing exercises and spoke gently to her. All that made her feel even worse. Reminding her how very broken she is without Him. 

Master returned home the following evening He carried with Him some truck-stop flowers and gifts for the kids. As mouse removed His shoes she cried a little from the joy of having Him home. Also that evening He allowed her to pleasure and love His body. In the morning we had a more difficult discussion. It was the if anything should happen to Him talk that mouse hates thinking about. Since mouse has been thoroughly tethered at least mentally, if not physically to Him -- there are things He doesn't want her to worry about. We should live in the moment and not worry about the future -- but trust that He's thoroughly planned for it. He made sure, once again that mouse knew where all the important papers are kept. The number of His attorney and everything else needed. He left instructions for everything. It's something every year or so He must remind mouse of and He will endure the choking sobs from His slave until He's finished. 

Master is never harsh about it. He knows it's something He must do for His own sanity, knowing how dependent the slave is on Him for practically everything. It's important to note, He wants her this way He loves her this way. As much as He needs to control her, He also needs to be pragmatic about His control. He held the slave as she cried and was soothing -- it was what she needed from Him. 

Undeterred Master quickly changed gears and reestablished His control over mouse when she was prattling on and on, a quick slap to her face reminded her that she was again property, her body was ruthlessly examined and was fucked soundly before enema that He administered personally (something He now does infrequently -- allowing mouse a teeny bit of agency). It's humiliating to endure, especially the end, with Him there. A big reminder that the only privacy mouse is allowed is because He allows the privacy. He went through the questions noting her discomfort about who owns her and the like. Reaffirming that He does own her made her body quiver. 

When He said rather casually that He does love her, she let out a sob and splintered into a million pieces that He rather calmly put back together. Then He showered with her and had her dress for the day. Master kept the day low key not wanting to put extra stress on her and watched her as she went about her chores. Even the ironing. Cooking the evening meal was extra wonderful because Master sharpened all the knives and cut up the vegetables, lifted the heavy dutch oven into and out of the oven and watched as the table was set (the kids handled that and the clean up after). Family movie night was a success and later we were back in the master bedroom, 

He watched as mouse undressed, brushed her teeth and went through the evening rituals, then had her wait on the floor, arms behind her back, waiting forehead pressed to the carpet until she heard Him approaching. The quiet swoosh of the flogger connecting with her backsides, caused her to jump but she didn't cry out. The good girl He clucked swelled within her as another blow fell followed by 5 others to redden her flesh but nothing to last. He did have her spread her legs wide and caught her pussy twice more, bringing tears to her eyes that fell silently. Then He moved her to the bed and fucked her ass. No lubricant, He knew it had to hurt and wanted her to suffer. Rarely mouse cums from anal, but that night, she most certainly did and it shocked, as much as it debased her. He deftly inserted a plug into her bottom and readied for bed, inviting her beside Him under the covers with her head close to this cock she worships and needs. 

Master mused that it was good for her to remember that cock is her Master (specifically His). Twice during the night she took it gently into her mouth and sucked the head. Not so much as to wake Him fully, just as an expression of her devotion to it and to Him. The second time, His body began to respond so mouse continued to lick and suck it, to her knowledge Master never woke but claimed to have had a really dirty dream (He mentioned it during His usual morning oral service). Feeling so very open and much like a vessel for Him to use as He feels fit, is the most exciting part of being a slave. It just deepens that connection to Him. 

Have We all Become Comfortably Numb?

 Hello? Is there anybody out there? Just nod if you can hear me, is there anyone home? 

Have we reached the point of complete apathy? Late February and early March brought some terrible news, our planet is is crisis (Covid might be just symptom), a country invaded. Master couldn't shield the slave from all the terrible news. He had to explain it. For once He simply lacked any words. He patted mouse's head and told her, "We can only do the best we can." 'Safe,' He reminded is a relative term. 

Our home, or rather Master's Home is His sanctuary or used to be, but that was before He was home all the time. He struggles now, silently, at first enjoying the free time to read whatever He wished. Then He began taking on a small project (something fun to work on He explained), which led to another. His semi-retired self isn't so semi retired now. He took on a bigger project. Nothing He can't handle, but very time consuming. The book He had started reading was abandoned because He doesn't have time for fun. Master is who He is. When we'd summer at the lake, He would need to pull himself from work. He'd work so hard in preparation to take that much time off and work just as hard when He returned to it two months later (really it was about 5 or 6 weeks but it was supposed to be two months). He just couldn't unplug from it for that long. Still, very much like this pattern, He eased into lake life, eventually forgetting to constantly check His phone (probably because also cell service is spotty), relaxed, lived nicely in those moments before restlessness kicked in and He found Himself, once again looking at His phone. 

How does sanctuary evolve into just another space? For Him, it's been difficult to transition to working exclusively from home. Not that an office away is an answer, it seems many people found working from their homes to be more productive. Maybe they'll eventually suffer a similar burnout? For parents with youngish children, mouse can certainly empathize with that. Once children reach a certain age they can (more or less) be ok to fend for themselves on a sick day -- providing they're not *that* sick. A parent working from home can certainly have greater flexibility with schools and young children. That's never been anything Master has needed to concern Himself with. This isn't to suggest He can't step up when He needs to and has many times. 

The apathy though is harder to shake. Still, we try. Master, just a few evenings ago, shook things up a little, in the privacy of His space, He called slave to Him and had her pleasure Him as He watched an old movie. He thoroughly controlled all her action, mostly nonverbally, slowing her down with a tug of her hair, applying pressure to one side her head or sending her deeper down His shaft. Time seemed to stretch out, not that mouse was bored, but rather obsessed with being pleasing to Him. Was He happy? Did He enjoy it when she swirled her tongue a certain way more than another way? The clues were absent but this was a marathon not a sprint. He controlled her, then had her pause and tossed her the bolster pillow on the chaise, and said to hump that as she sucked him. Cock deep in mouth mouse awkwardly rocked on that pillow, never having it quite hit that one spot. The clit just throbbed with want as she tried to focus on His pleasure but found herself constantly losing the battle. 

After what seemed to be forever, Master finally concluded sending a nice stream of cum down her opened throat, then held her fast and a second stream, followed. He asked if she had orgasmed at any point, and she truthfully answered that she hadn't. He extended His leg and told her to hump that until she came. He returned His attention to film on TV and ignored the slave humping away on His leg, as her face just burned with humiliation. 

Yes, orgasm happened but it took a bit, then of course, she had clean His leg, hands are forbidden so...Once again her mouth was useful. Sated, she remained close to Him, almost afraid to move. Once again that invisible chain bound her to Him and the rattle was loud in her head. 

The night that followed was nearly a repeat, except when the pillow brought her no pleasure He said nothing, just returned His attention to whatever sports event was on the TV. Yet, maybe hopeful, maybe just tired herself, mouse remained close to Master, her head resting on His knee, until He suggested that she go into the other room to read and unlocked her iPad. Still on her knees she took the device and thanked Him. 

It's strange how protocols evolve. Thanking Him is rote (yes He also says the words Thank you frequently but never following something He believes is His right) and often she can't help but to gush over Him with words of love. However the latest protocol seems to be when the slave is dismissed she doesn't simply rise and walk away. but rather she rises, thanks Him again and takes a few steps backward before turning (putting on the bathrobe) and then leaving the room. 

Eventually Master did poke His out of the room and said He was going to bed, this was a signal for mouse to stop what she was reading and join Him but she was nearly at the end and really wanted to finish the last few pages. Well the end was a bit further than she realized and she while she did finish the story nearly an hour had passed and Master was fast asleep. Not having His permission to enter the bed, mouse went to the "bad girl" spot and curled up there as best she could. Quietly snuffling because she was foolish, mouse eventually fell into a troubled sleep. In the morning she woke before Master and rushed to ready herself, make the coffee, fix His breakfast and served Him in bed. Yes blatant attempt to make amends for the wrong she had done. 

The guilt because she had missed the chance to give Master a proper goodnight, because she was selfish was a bit overwhelming for her. When had that begun? Before she would have simply accepted that sleeping on the cold floor in the bad girl spot was her punishment -- now she needed His forgiveness or punishment to feel complete. He might have just enjoyed the extra showering of attention He received because He never said a word about it. He might have even punished mouse on that evening when she again found herself on her knees pleasing Him with her mouth, the only absent was the pillow.  Of course that could have been in her head. 

When He again unlocked the iPad and handed it to her, but this time she stayed put and looked for a new book to read then made note of them to ask Him to take a look to approve. When it was time for bed, she closed it at once and followed Him into the bathroom and at the bed, she knelt and begged permission to enter. It felt wonderful being near Him in bed, not feeling so very exiled and yet not fully contented.  

*Note from Omega -- Mouse is frustrated with me. As I read her account, I simply scheduled it for publishing (note: we routinely do this in the event she wishes to add or take away from a post, then it returns to me for approval and so on until it is published or discarded). No comment was or is forthcoming about her feelings of 'exile' or remorse. This journal's purpose is for mouse to voice her views on her slavery and I feel no such compulsion to clarify further. 

Letting it Go

It’s been a weird stretch, hasn’t it? Are we really at the end? The Magic 8 Ball says to "Ask Again Later." Maybe that silly ball is smarter than everyone? Spring is in the air, sort of, at least mouse is ready for it. There's been this district lethargy of late, we've all felt it since the end of the holidays. Maybe it's just been the pandemic wearing us down to a nub? Everything feels untidy and disorganized, even if technically it's not. In January mouse hit a wall where cooking was concerned. Everything felt like "this again?" We spent a week or two with simple meals or big meals that provided too many left overs, so the weeks cooking became a queue for the microwave. The breakfast/lunch table became a hub of things that needed putting away and the dining table became the place an overly ambitious project was started when our weather turned bad, but the poor weather didn't last long enough to complete it. Little by little when the weather is poor, or mouse finds herself with nothing else to do (which is incredibly rare) a bit is tackled and then abandoned. The thought was that even a little progress is progress however, that was simply a lie she told herself. 

Now, it's been weeks and mouse is tired of it, so after spending Sunday sorting through a lot of it, mouse put all away. At least, it's partially organized so it can easily be started again. At least now, the dining room table is cleared off and can be utilized again. So, where have been we been eating? Mostly on the fly, as mouse mentioned the queue forming for the microwave, everyone has been eating more of less on their own schedule. The next step was to clear off the breakfast table and other dumping grounds and then she devilishly set the table so it couldn't be re-cluttered up. 

The Little Things We Used To Do

Remember those things? One evening mouse began looking through the blog and recalling that she used to make scones, now to be sure it's been a while since mouse last made those. It was so easy, just make the dough and freeze it, defrost it overnight in the fridge and bake. Add a little homemade jam, and it's a wonderful thing. Yes, making homemade jam...is another of those things. Not the kind where you have a crate of fruit and spend hours canning (although you can) but this is just made as needed, couple cups of fresh berries (whatever look and taste good -- we like assorted berries. As they begin to cook down, add a little cinnamon, lemon (zest or juice or why not both?) and whatever else. Add the sugar (or honey) if you feel it needs it, this time of year the berries tend to be a bit tart. 

Pre-pandemic from around March until November, mouse would schlepp herself to the farmers market nearly every week for fresh fruits, vegetables, eggs and cheese. Then when lockdown occurred, the market was shuttered and honestly mouse forgot all about it. Since the grocery store prices have been unbelievable lately, mouse decided to check out the farmers market scene again. Can't say that mouse was impressed with the prices there, maybe a little better on some items but far worse than others and quality in general better than the grocer, not so great that it justified the extra money. Food wise mouse has settled into a rut of pasta bakes, which aren't the most healthy things even if you try to healthy them up by using a wheat pasta...it's still pasta. There's been a lot of apathy and lack of interest in daily cooking. Adding to that the high prices and lack of inspiration it's been a huge struggle. Is that how we're going to divide our lives, pre and post pandemic? Like when Grandma used to talk about before the depression. Not sure if this that kind of life altering event, but it sure feels like it. 

Whatever it's time to shake off that apathetic mouse and return to a more cohesive business as usual. 

We'll see how that goes for us. 

It Goes to Show, You Don't Ever Know

 

Since it cost a lot to win 

And even more to lose

You and me bound to spend some time

Wondering what to choose -- Deal; Robert Hunter, Jerry Garcia 

It was warm today, like short sleeve warm. Just stealing a few moments as mouse sits looking out the picture window into the bleak winter backyard. During the winter months we can see clear to the other side of the canyon and creek beyond it. During the remaining months, which amounts to most of them, the view is only trees teeming with wildlife, squirrels, rabbits, possums, raccoons all find their way into our yard, birds fill the trees, crows caw and even the pair of ravens with the gravely tones. We see owls when the weather is decent, hawks and even eagles. 

The house is loud today, not with music but with the sounds of disgruntled people who are angry about chores. While we try to remind them, we need to be kind to each other, as we are all we have...Well, as they say in the car commercials "Your mileage may vary." Off they go ago, on to the next squabble. 

Don't misunderstand there are moments where they cooperate, even are helpful so we suppose that hope springs eternal. At least that's what we would think, once the shock wore off. This morning was typical, the alarm woke Master and He pulled mouse's head to His cock for some morning attention, we showered together, Master having slave hold her arms above her head most of the time as He inspected and washed her body, He turned the water to cold, as He exited to give mouse the opportunity to wash her hair. Warm water is His privilege that He shares often with His slave, as are showers. Drying off with His discarded damp towel mouse hurries to get ahead of Him, pulling on her bathrobe and quickly brushing her teeth, before heading to the kitchen to rattle those pots and pans. 

We grind our coffee beans, recently switched to a crank machine (yes coffee we determined is too important) loading into the french press. We've had power issues in the past, but the gas range can be lit with a match if needed. This morning the breakfast consisted of eggs, oatmeal and fresh fruit (oranges, apples, banana and blueberries). Honestly, these past couple years, mouse has gotten pretty darn good at wielding a knife and the fruit is cut up in no time at all. Likewise the oatmeal is done, that gets some dried fruits, nuts and seeds. One child takes all the fruit and dumps it into the bowl with the oatmeal and other just likes the nuts and eats the fruit on the side. Everyone gets a cup of fruit, growing kids get oatmeal (and often slave) Master gets an omelet, usually with cheese and whatever meat is left over. He's really not very picky. Everyone sits together at the breakfast table (that's a rule). The day is discussed, chores divvied up, arguments thwarted (about the aforementioned chores) and then after thanking mouse for breakfast, they depart to begin their day. Master remains and He goes over the agenda for mouse. 

While mouse was just about to write that there's not been very much BDSMy fun of late, that just isn't true, since every moment of mouse's day is dictated by Him. From start to finish, what is done, when and even how is outlined by Him. Now, this isn't as daunting as it seems. The tasks are more or less rote. One thing mouse must do daily is get at least 30 minutes of exercise. That began as outdoor walks with Master and when the weather turned miserable, changed to mouse just walking on the treadmill.

It helps to clear her head and help her to concentrate, and as a bonus she can watch something on Netflix as she exercises.Mental health wise, mouse has been much better. The world infringes on our home more than we'd like. We added a resolution that we're going to try to waste less food. The most expensive food is the one you throw away, so we're trying to buy only what we'll use. Nighttime, we watch a little, very little TV, usually something kid friendly at least somewhat (they're growing up). After they go to bed, Master and slave retreat to our room, and mouse undresses and prepares to be useful to Him. Master might discuss issues that mouse needs to keep working on and might punish her if truly needed. 

Most evenings He will watch something on TV in our room, or work in His study. If He's working mouse remains in the family room within earshot if He needs something. In our bedroom, mouse undresses and remains nude and will wait to be useful to Him or whatever else He needs. If semi-retired means working less, then mouse doesn't see the point but He's thrilled with this. The pandemic is unending and we're just doing what we need to do to keep ourselves safe. If that means hiding in our cave for a while we'll gladly do this. 

We hope everyone is healthy and doing well.