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Wednesday, August 8, 2012

Falls Like Tears

Sometimes it feels like our relationship is simply doomed to fail. We're just two totally different people in probably too many ways; impossible, often to reconcile our selves. There are moments when mouse just becomes angry with him. He's too analytical, level-headed, stubborn and a host of other things mouse is honestly too angry to recall. He's too calm and can probably do everything better than mouse. He just knows himself very well.

He's not the type, like when his car wouldn't go into gear suddenly, to pop the hood and try to figure out what was wrong. He simply calmly called the auto club. Then he phoned work -- honestly he would never phone mouse until the very last. Not because she's not important, but he wouldn't want her to worry. He's a boy scout who carries flares in his trunk.

Recently on a country road, he came upon a car accident right after it occurred. It was becoming dark, so he set out flares to warn others. He would have probably done it during the day. He has blankets and water in there also. Oh and a change of shoes. First aid kit and rubber gloves.

Who does that? Yes very prepared, people.

When there's a problem, he's the calm one. He rarely loses his temper (seriously that's possibly the biggest, most annoying thing about him -- other than when he does lose it watch out). He can see things clearly even if mouse can't. It's not easy to live with.

Yet, despite mouse's emotional volatility, who easily becomes wrapped up in silly things like worries or fears...we seem to balance each other. Or provide balance to each other. Guess we do kinda fit together...like the way magnets are drawn to each other...

But they do repell also. Thankfully we don't really have that issue!

When the baby was ill, mouse was unglued...he was calm.

Thank goodness for that! But still, while its going on its kinda annoying. Then mouse wonders what she brings to it all...other than escape from his deeply predictable, carefully planned existence.

Oh yes, when mouse began this post she was angry with him. All his levelheadedness. There was a point (really), but really can't think about why now...somehow in this sideways rant, mouse lost it. Lol.

Song selection: Love, Regn O'er Me; The Who

 

16 comments:

  1. Oh! I definitely understand this.

    However as annoying as it all is..and it is bloody annoying its these very traits that i find give me the security i need, i may not think that at the time when im going around flapping like a mad thing and he is calm and organised..dont get me started on his organisation!.

    Or when im pissed off at him and lose my temper and he is not rising to it..instead he is level headed and wont 'deal' with it until im calm and its frustrating i have screamed at him sometimes "why cant you just shout/argue back" but that would mean losing his temper which would mean losing his control and oh no he doesnt do that.

    But all this annoying frustrating behaviour is the calm i need...just dont want to see that at the time.

    Sometimes i actually do wander if im the frustrating one.

    x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. tori -- sooo totally understand what you're saying. Especially the last bit about wondering if you're the annoying one...

      Really mouse thinks that often!

      Hugs,
      mouse

      Delete
  2. Such a beautiful end of a very honest post.

    Thanks for sharing.

    appy

    ReplyDelete
  3. mouse,
    You are not alone! When I married my husband, friends made bets on how long it would last. I was super shy and meek, he was outgoing and forceful. I make lists because I'm forgetful, he remembers every little thing! I make him crazy at times, he drives me insane. We have been married now 23 years. We balance each other out. The good outweighs the bad in our relationship, even though we are polar opposites of each other.

    Melissa

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Melissa and you're right it's all about balance. Thanks for reading and taking the time to comment.

      Hugs,
      mouse

      Delete
  4. I think Omega's analogy of two sides of the same coin really fits. I totally get your frustration about him always being calm. H is very much that way. So was my father. I no longer get so upset, I guess cause I know H's calmness helps my anxiety...and when he does get mad, I hate hate hate it. It's scary and my anxiety goes thru the roof. I feel like the floor under me has disappeared and it's the scariest feeling. Much rather have his calm, 'I know how to handle everything' demeaner.
    H's parents thought our marriage was doomed as well. H was a solid mid west boy and I was(still am) a flighty Californian girl. We celebrated our 20th wedding anniversary yesterday. ;) I too think we are two sides of the same coin now.
    Hugs back,
    mg

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. mg,

      LMAO flighty California girl....that's mouse. Always distracted by shiny things. Daddy has said more than once you can take mouse out of California but you'll never take California out of mouse.

      And he's not saying if that's a good or bad thing....lol

      Hugs,
      mouse

      Delete
  5. there seems to be a rash of this going around

    perhaps that full moon that just passed.

    hugs -- and smiles of understanding

    sfp

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. True enough. But also kinda funny.

      Hugs,
      mouse

      Delete
  6. don'cha just hate when you're all set to vent your righteous indignation and by the time you're done sputtering, all you've done is remind yourself how nuts you are about the man...?
    maddening...

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Completely but not only all that...totally forget what had mouse going to begin with....

      What's worse?? It still hasn't come back to mouse....

      Seriously.

      Delete
  7. There is such an insightful tone to this post--glad I stumbled upon it. I think the balance, however it presents itself is key in any relationship. I can certainly understand annoying it is to live with someone who doesn't "loose it" :o)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It's funny because talking with his mom, he's always kinda been like that. He's more the type to analyze a situation than react to it. This doesn't mean it never happens.....

      But it's very rare. Whereas mouse just kinda erupts.

      Like a volcano that they KNOW will, they just aren't sure when.

      Hugs,
      mouse

      Delete
  8. I love how much you feel for the man in your life. It's scary sometimes is it not? But I think it's worth it. :)
    I hope you have a great weekend together xo

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Couldn't live without him....

      Wouldn't want to think about trying.

      Hugs,
      mouse

      Delete

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