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Friday, September 6, 2013

Justifying

There are times when mouse feels the need to justify to practical strangers how we live. Even on the blog -- we're not talking negative comments but comments made innocently about how they're happy their Dom isn't like that. Some have mentioned (not recently) to mouse privately they couldn't handle such a controlling Master. In the past some have even questioned if it's healthy to be so dependent.

Out in the world, people project their own emotions onto others, without even thinking about it. Sometimes mouse will watch people and imagine who's submissive, who's Dom -- who's on a first date or who's breaking up or having an affair. Now, she keeps those thoughts to herself and doesn't go up to strangers telling them they're doing something wrong or she hopes they last....whatever!

Last night, Daddy took mouse out for dinner. Alone just the two of us. Does anyone know how rare that is? Seriously, mouse even shaved her legs! Yes, she's a slave -- but she's also a mom of a busy toddler who doesn't get five minutes alone to shave her legs properly. Fine! There mouse admits she doesn't always shave her legs...quick someone call the lifestyle police!

So we went our, mouse had her nails and toes done. We already established that she shaved her legs. Daddy ramped mouse up into delicious headspace. He led her to his car, opened her door, helped her inside, put on her seatbelt, lifted her dress....hands went up her thigh....legs parted, mouse was panting....

Feeling swimmy and mentally staring at Daddy....totally not his face...mouse was in full on slave mode. Blocks from our home Daddy stopped the car and spanked her too. It made mouse so hot she nearly orgasmed. Then he got her back into the car, adjusted her seatbelt, lifted her dress...his touch sent mouse....he got her just near the edge....

Back in the car...mouse was so happy. Quiet, her mind wasn't clicking off about the baby. No worries at all entered her mind.

At the restaurant Daddy had his hand on the small of mouse's back. The server learned quickly mouse didn't speak. Daddy ordered two glasses of wine, and an appetizer. Daddy won't be rushed into ordering the meal. Once the wine and appetizer arrived, he had settled on an entree. While he spoke to the server, mouse arranged a portion of the appetizer on the plate provided and placed it in front of Daddy.

He took a bite, said was fair and offered a bite to mouse, which he fed her and it made her feel sexy. Restaurant portions are usually too large, So Daddy ordered a large dinner salad and entree and he fed mouse. It felt so very intimate and lovely. After he ordered dessert a rich, decadent chocolate mousse and coffee for himself (mouse cannot drink coffee in the evenings). He took a small bite of the mousse and fed the rest to mouse.

He's soooo lucky he fed it to her, because she would have certainly humiliated him had she fed herself! Can you image something sooo wonderful you want to lick the bowl? Or at the very least use your finger to scoop the sides...ok only mouse thinks that way.

In any event, mouse asked permission to use the ladies room after Daddy paid the check. He walked her the ladies room. No he didn't follow her inside, he waited outside like a gentleman. While in there, mouse heard the door open, paying no attention tho she just finished, flushed and left. Two women were standing by the sink, and mouse assumed they were waiting to use the bathroom. So mouse just went about washing her hands, the women were nudging each other...it was weird, but mouse just went about washing and drying her hands.

Then it happened, a woman approached mouse telling her she was being abused just as mouse was digging through her bag to get her lipstick.

Seriously!

The woman said she felt mouse's dinner companion was a classic abuser. The way he controlled her food, what she drank -- he didn't let her order for herself! Oh the inhumanity of it all! Oh my fucking god he walked her to the bathroom -- that's just wrong!

The delicious headspace was deflated like a balloon.

Surprisingly mouse didn't cry or even respond. Or acknowledge them in anyway. But she was pissed off. Why can't people just mind their own fucking business? It's not like he made her take her tits out or drag her around on a dog leash or make her eat out of a bowl. He didn't say shaddup bitch...He didn't say...don't look at my woman...or grab her crotch and say that it belongs to him or that's where his babies come from.

He didn't hit her or even raise his voice. Daddy was polite. He's always a gentleman. Why is perfectly fine for a women to openly bash her husband, call him stupid and that's fine? But Daddy can't feed mouse?! That's making her subjugated and requires rescue?

What's worse, why does mouse need to justify herself?

All the way home mouse was sullen. Daddy knew something had happened, but didn't ask until we were in the car. He said it must have been distressing. Now mouse was starting to break down a little her anger she wanted so much to hold onto was ebbing away. Why did this make her want to give him more control?? To show them that she liked it so much...or to somehow prove it to herself that her trust is genuine.

When we got home, mouse sat down and wrote out every account she could think of...email, blog...social networking, game and anything else she could think of...and added the passwords. Including the main password for her iPad. Then she handed the list to Daddy and asked him to lock her out of everything listed. He could change all the passwords. If she needed to wish someone a happy birthday, she would have to ask his permission and he could log her in. Blogging would be the same. He could simply log mouse into our blog....

Daddy said we'd talk about in a few days when mouse had a chance to really think about it.

So far she hasn't changed her mind.

42 comments:

  1. I know i would have found that distressing if it was too happen to me, so im sorry that you had to have that happen to you, its just simply bad manners in my mind.

    You know things like this remind me of a dinner we attended months ago, a man at our table was belittling his wife, putting her down but under the guise of 'having a laugh' but it wasnt funny, his wife was clearly embarrassed as was i.

    But no one said anything, it was awkward, anyway when the waiter comes to fill up the wine glasses i look to the bossman for a nod of approval to have more wine, Master put his hand over my glass to signal to the waiter not to pour any in (he felt i had had enough)....that was commented about, references made that was i incapable of making my own mind up,...i believe the term 'control freak' was used by a friend later in the week...she was concerned!

    But nothing was said about this obnoxious man and his poor wife, because 'he didnt mean it' it was only 'messing around' but i found it awful i wouldnt like to be treated like that in a public setting, and i know he wouldnt speak to me like that, but yet the bossman covering my glass apparently is much more of a big issue!


    I think people tend to make judgements and criticisms when they have no understanding and sometimes being ignorant is the easier option, another reason is envy.

    Try not to dwell on this too much, dont let their ignorance and blatant rudeness impact on you, although i appreciate its upsetting.

    x




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    1. Tori,

      Think women watch too much made-for-tv movies. At least some do. They miss the obvious signs something is off in favor of subtle ones? It's beyond silly.

      Delete
  2. Mouse,

    When we discussed this matter this morning, I asked that you hold off on publishing this particular entry. I needed time to consider the ramifications of your unique offer. I image you found this very distressing and continue to torture yourself by reliving it in your mind. Mouse stop.

    I am quite tempted obliged your request and damn the consequence and inconvenience to both of us. It might provide you a timely lesson in patience and being more cautious about what you wish for.

    Omega

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    Replies
    1. Yes Daddy. Sorry. You're right of course.

      Forever,
      m

      Delete
  3. Honestly? Why people can't mind their own business is because you LOOKED in many ways like you were being abused. Abusers tend not to 'drag people around on a dog leash' in public, they do it in far more subtle ways. There is a lot of crossover between BDSM and abuse and the key distinction is consent. But consent can't be easily cisually conveyed. For instance, if you had obvious bruises on your neck, from a consensual session, it would be perfectly legitimate for some stranger to ask if you were OK or if you were being abused. Because bruises are a sign of abuse and not just consensual sex. You shouldn't wait until you KNOW, you should ask and be a kind person and check the other person is OK. And what is it to you if they 'deflated' your mood? Would you rather that an abused spouse was left alone and feeling unsupported, feeling as though this controlling nature which they did NOT consent to was completely normal? Feel lucky that there are people out there willing to intervene on the part of people they feel might be being abused rather than feeling victimised. Your self-righteous why-can't-people-just-understand-that-I'm-in-a-BDSM-relationship thing really pisses me off. And I'm IN that sort of relationship. Get over yourself.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. There were no indications. No bruises. We smiled, kissed, whispered...the only thing he did was order the meal and feed mouse. Which was fun and sexy.

      Yes it deflated mouse's mood and BDSM hasn't a thing to do with it. Very sorry that mouse offended you.

      Delete
    2. Oh.

      Perhaps i have misinterpreted this post differently to you, and although not a witness to the events myself, reading it as mouse has described does not seem in any way abusive....intimate, sexy, and attentative yes, i think if i were to witness it i would think how romantic, loving to see a couple so relaxed with one another.

      However i do appreciate that we dont always 'see' what others 'see'....good lord a couple enjoying each others company, happy and relaxed!!!! must have been awful for those poor ladies to witness such a thing...yeah thats sarcasm.

      I thought your comment of "Your self-righteous why-cant-people-just-understand-that-im-in-a-BDSM-relationship thing really pisses me off" more offensive.

      *i understand if you dont wish to post this comment*





      Delete
    3. Tori,

      Yes...This is what mouse has such a hard time wrapping her head around. Do we really live in a society where if someone behaves like a gentleman is automatically viewed as abusive?

      Of course there are people who are abused, and we should act -- but we should require more evidence than a single act of placing a hand over a glass of wine, or feeding someone off their plate. You might as well go to a restaurant and move from table to table questioning everyone about their relationship health.

      Delete
    4. But Bunny, those women DIDN'T ask Mouse.

      They didn't check in with her, they TOLD her. they TOLD her that her husband was an abuser and what he was doing was wrong. they didn't ASK her if she was ok, if she was frightened or if she needed help.

      See the difference?

      Delete
    5. ^^^^ this.

      Exactly. There was no asking, but a lot of telling.

      Thank you!

      Delete
  4. Oh mouse! I'm so sorry! Justifying your lifestyle just stinks! For me, the more control Daddy exercising over me, the more secure I feel. I know that those on the outside would probably view that as abuse, but it's what brings us peace, comfort and happiness. Through the way you write, you are gloriously happy in your chosen lifestyle and why others feel that they should save you from that is beyond me.

    hugs
    p

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  5. i would encourage you to think about why you let it bother you and what else you feel besides anger. It is very hard to feel judged, but it is something that happens to everyone and it will continue to happen. YOu have to learn why it causes a reaction and how you can combat that. You cant change others or how they will react but you can change yourself and not let them get under your skin. Stay patient and stay positive. Don't swoop to their level, and try to remain confident. You are in a relationship that makes you happy and fulfilled and that is what matters the most!

    ReplyDelete
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    1. Thanks! Think it was really because we get out sooo rarely without the kids. But you're totally correct. Thanks again.

      Hugs,
      mouse

      Delete
  6. Oh Sweety! I'm so sorry you were upset like that!!! I'm going to e-mail you tomorrow but the boy is calling me to read to him. It's way past his bedtime.

    and no, you are not the only one who gets carried away by a delightful dessert, or is tempted to lick the bowl. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks!! Look forward to it!

      <3 and hugs,
      mouse

      Delete
  7. mouse, I have only had something vaguely like this happen to me once and I responded just as you did - I didn't acknowledge the woman. This really got to her and she went on and on until I said in a very forceful but low tone: "Get out of my way" and she moved on. Later, I berated myself over and over for not being gutsy enough to say more but I continue to believe that responding with dignity and refusing to allow them to see my upset was the right response for me. People who confront in this way are really looking for you to interact with them and so no interaction continues to be, I believe, the best response. It is upsetting, without a shadow of a doubt, but nonsense in the scheme of things. See it for what it is - ignorance - and do your best to put it out of your mind. Hugs xx

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    1. Vesta,

      It took mouse completely off guard. And yes, she wished after that she had said more.

      Thanks for understanding.

      Hugs!

      Delete
  8. What an awful way to end what sounded like an altogether wonderful evening. I can't believe the nerve of people sometimes. I would be over the moon if Sir took control like that. To quote a brilliant book series "Don't let the muggles get you down:-)"

    hugs,
    Ren

    ReplyDelete
  9. Ooh, it sucks when you get that once in a millennium (hey, it feels like that sometimes) trip out just the two of you, and something rains on the parade.
    It is odd to me the situations where people will choose to speak up, and the ones where they don't...
    I always wish my husband would order for me because I can never make up my mind lol.

    And if I had a dollar for every time one of the kids caught me in the kitchen licking the chocolate bowl...

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    Replies
    1. It's funny, Daddy hates it when mouse uses her fingers to taste something. He just can't stand it. Once after making brownies, mouse ran her finger around the side of the empty bowl, Daddy just about flipped...so mouse picked up the bowl and just licked it. Lmao.

      Brownie batter is yummy! Lol.

      But yes, it's so rare....and seriously mouse worked hard...shaving everything, plucking, putting on eyeshadow, getting her face just right and feeling totally sexy....plus it was a fantastic hair day too! Plus the anticipation of really hot sex later...

      Well there was sex...angry sex is fun too. Lol

      Hugs,
      mouse

      Delete
  10. It is a shame that those woman in the bathroom hurt you by suggesting abuse in your relationship when there is none, but I find myself wondering if you have considered that they spoke up because they were concerned for a fellow human being...you! What if you WERE being abused and they actually gave you a way out of a bad place? They misread what was happening between you and your daddy, and they probably didn't express it in the best of ways, but I think when we "mind our own business" we may walk by someone who really needs our help. They chose to not just walk by and I think at some level you should be glad they reached out because the next person they reach out too may actually need their help.

    I understand why your first response was anger, because you felt they were attacking your daddy, and so it was probably wise not to respond, but what if you had responded by thanking them for their concern and telling them how wild you are about him and how much you enjoyed the way he was treating you?

    Anyway, just some random thoughts...

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    1. Actually the first thought was shock followed by anger later. But yes, had mouse been able to think she might have said something very much like that.

      Thanks for your comment!

      Hugs

      Delete
  11. I think that often the problem that 'outsiders' have is simply that they view a situation and see only the part of what happens that they *want* to see. I completely agree that there is always the possibility that someone who is being genuinely abused would welcome the lifeline, but I also think that if they hadn't spent so long studying what your Dom was supposedly doing *to* you and had spent a little more time watching how you received this alleged "abuse", they might have gained a more accurate picture of how things really are. If they did take in your positive reactions and spoke to you because they didn't approve, then I doubt they saw the irony of the fact that *they* were effectively trying to control your power of free choice.

    There is a streak of this in-denial, contradictory attitude that runs through every anti TTWD discussion I have ever read or heard.

    The argument is always that men who 'abuse' women by 'hitting' them and 'taking away their freedom of choice' should be subject to various creatively violent consequences that are far worse than anything anyone would dream of applying in the controlled and regulated environment of any kind BDSM activity. The people who come up with these cruel and unusual punishments are usually completely oblivious to the fact that, in the same breathe that they are yelling "violence and abuse!!!", they are advocating a much more extreme version of both themselves.

    Then when anyone dares to explain the supposed abusive situation is a consensual and desired one, quite often sought out or *initiated* by the sub, this is either completely ignored (just as those women chose to ignore your reaction to your Dom's actions), or it becomes a way to judge and condemn the choices of the sub and to suggest that, since her choices aren't something that *they* would want, there must be mental illness or personality disorder involved.

    The great irony of all these arguments is that they are all contrary and personal in nature. The argument that "violence" should not be allowed is countered by the advocacy of far greater violence. The argument that a sub has no freedom of choice is countered by the fact that the people who are so indignant about this actually want to control the sub's freedom to choose the way in which she lives her life.

    Overall the message is the time honoured one of,

    "You have a right to my opinion".

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. DL,

      Can you hear mouse's applause? Seriously, you nailed it. They weren't looking at mouse at all, only him. They indicted him based on his actions and ignored the reactions of mouse. It's sad really when you think of it. It makes mouse wonder if she were dressed in a full burka, would they have said anything at all?

      Really, what you wrote was fantastic! Thank you.

      Hugs,
      mouse

      Delete
  12. What is sad to me is that these same women are probably the same ones who think Fifty Shades of Grey is a groundbreaking book and a 'bdsm handbook' when really, to me, its a trilogy about an abusive relationship. Why? Like someone else said, the difference between a bdsm relationship and an abusive relationship can be one simple thing: consent.

    I'm sorry your evening was ruined, mouse! I'm a long time reader of your blog, first time commenter. I really hope Daddy/Omega doesn't restrict your blogging!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Welcome!! Totally on the same page about 50 shades of grey. :)

      Oh, no he already said he won't restrict the blogging...we are in the midst of a disagreement...but it's ok really!

      Hope you comment again!

      Hugs,
      mouse

      Delete
  13. Fascinating writing style -- I'll back for more :) As for the evening itself... there I was thinking how perfect and romantic everything was... "abuse" never even entered my mind. I think you're a very lucky mouse ;-)

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    1. Thanks mala and welcome! Don't be a stranger ;)

      Delete
  14. mouse,
    Oh goodness humans can be such silly creatures. I took time before deciding to leave a comment because I value and respect that this is your personal space and that even though you make it public at the end of the day it is your private virtual world and it is not my place to impose my thoughts on you. After considering my response to your evening I realised I could share my thoughts in a respectful manner, with the intent of bringing, at the very most continued conversation and at the very least, a comment you could just skip over.

    As I read your words, I imagined what my reaction would have been had I witnessed you with Omega. At first I attached my own feelings to the situation, how I would feel if my Master interacted with me in the same way Omega did with you. I became aware, quite quickly, that I would have been profoundly uncomfortable and any sense of closeness and intimacy would have dissipated immediately. I think it is common for people to project their own feelings on a situation, putting ourselves in the situation instead of thinking of how the actual party is engaging and what they are feeling. After I was able to remove myself and focus solely on picturing you and Omega, I realised I still felt uncomfortable.

    I am not one to appreciate public displays of affection, in fact demonstrative attention often leaves me with a prickly feeling. This though is my hurdle and I have come to understand this and work on it daily. Would I have found your interaction romantic, intimate, affectionate? Maybe. Maybe not.. Would it matter though what I thought? Nope. A lesson that has taken a very long time to learn is that unless it is an illegal act, it is not my place to comment on one's behaviour, to expect behaviours to change simply to ensure I am comfortable. Is it my right to speak my mind? Yes. Freedom of speech permits this; however, just because I have the right to say something does not mean I have to exercise that right. The reality is I probably would have been uncomfortable watching you and Omega, especially if I over heard any conversation such as him ordering for you. I would not have thought you were in an abusive relationship though simply because from your description, nothing you and Omega did appears to resemble that of an abusive exchange. Had I thought for a moment that you might be experiencing abuse I would have approached you in the bathroom, not in an accusatory manner as those ladies did, but rather in a way that allowed you to know even as a stranger I was there to help. I would have left you my phone number or a number of a therapist (as that is my field). I believe it is important for everyone to ask questions when genuine concern is made; however, it is a fine fragile line and respect, from my experience, works far better than judgement.

    .... continued...

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    1. Now this is something mouse can completely understand. Daddy said it was, "the public display of submission most find off putting" It was openly and unusually intimate for us. Because Omega generally isn't like that often either. But he was happy to indulge mouse and lull her into that headspace she often craves.

      Omega has already asked that mouse "sit with her anger" to understand why it was such a trigger. The only thing so far mouse can think of is that she was a long time ago in a very abusive relationship and no one did a thing. And to be honest it was far and away more apparent that the relationship was completely off than anything Daddy and mouse have done.

      Now he said mouse should look at things differently, in the last decade there has been more awareness about domestic violence. And mouse does get that.

      The relationship with Omega isn't anything like that and that their are people out there who might think its bad...well that just hurts. Guess, it hurts on more than just one level...

      It's just that if what Omega does could be viewed as some as abusive, then what went on 12 years ago should have been even more glaringly evident.

      Everything you wrote totally makes sense. Really mouse totally thanks you for writing all this.

      Thank you again so much!!

      Delete
  15. ...continued...
    People fear the unknown. They balk at what they themselves do not understand and our flawed existence often leaves the majority jumping to conclusions. This is an unfortunate reality and one I have come to embrace and try to work with. The verbal assault from those two women does not surprise me; however, what I wonder is why did those strangers words have such a controlling impact on your emotions and the joy you were sharing with Omega? I am not asking to analyze you mouse, I simply think it may benefit you, leave you feeling stronger and more in control of those who criticize if you understood why it had such a hold on you. I do not believe you think for a single second that Omega abuses you. I can not imagine that you feel as though your relationship is negative or unhealthy therefore I encourage you to look inward and try to understand the why in the hopes of learning new tools to avoid feeling this way again.

    Love comes in all sorts of shapes and sizes. It does not fit in just one box. Your love is different from the love I have with Master and my love with Master is different from any other couple and so on and so forth. It is not better nor worse, it is simply different.

    Wishing you peace and balance sweet mouse.
    x
    ~cockdoll

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    Replies
    1. Probably should have replied to this part of your post....

      Replied to part one.

      Hugs!

      Delete
  16. mouse,
    I do recall the moments you have written about your previous relationship and the abuse you endured. I nod my head in agreement to what Omega has stated in regards to the level of awareness involving domestic abuse. Ten years ago many people still felt it was okay to "keep your woman in line" however, that attitude, for the most part, has changed and is not an acceptable thought. I have come to learn that if people feel no danger for themselves they are more often vocal in their ideas. This could be one reason why those two women approached you, they did not feel harm would come their way whereas in the past women might have been worried for themselves as well as for you. Also and a more likely thought is that women (and men) are feeling more empowered to be vocal when spotting abuse, (whether it is actual abuse or not) therefore the chances of you hearing more comments is quite possible.

    Power exchange relationships will more often than not be scrutinized simply because people do not understand them. I can speak from experience on both spectrums because I a). am in a power exchange relationship and b). I have found myself prickled by observing other peoples power exchanges. I do not say that easily, it has taken me a great deal of soul searching to come to terms with my shortcomings; however, the truth is there are many power exchange relationships that I question, that I do not understand nor agree with. Does this mean they are abusive? No. Are some of them abusive? Absolutely. Not all are though. Some simply are unions I myself would not like to experience. Because I am aware of my own questions I completely understand why others are confused or scared or troubled by such an exchange. At the end of the day I would rather have people asking questions or sharing their opinions and worries than not saying anything at all. Of course this opens me up to women like you experienced, still, I know Master does not abuse me. I know I am not in an abusive relationship and at the end of the day what he and I know is all that matters.

    Big, warm hugs,
    ~cockdoll

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    1. Yes! At the very end of the day it's true. The relationship isn't abusive. It's a shame other's can't see it...or just accept that it's because of trailblazing feminists that we can decide to be who we are.

      Hugs,
      mouse

      Delete
  17. Dearest mouse,

    First, i admit that i could not read any more replies after the one that felt like it attacked you. What i was thinking, reading your account, was that you sounded like a couple in love with each other. i heard tenderness and intimacy.

    My question about the women in the bathroom was if they really thought you were being abused, what were they prepared to do about that? Did they actually think it through? What if they had approached someone who was abused in that manner? Let's say the woman admitted this to total strangers. The question remains, what could have happened next? Were they going to perform a citizen's arrest?

    i know how bad it feels for people to witness what should be obviously abusive behaviors...for example, the time i was literally being beaten and punched in the middle of the street. No one helped me and it added to my feelings of helplessness.

    If someone approached me now, especially a total stranger, when Sir Raven is indeed a gentleman in public, i would feel irate. It would be livid that anyone was judging her in the same light as a person who did their best to destroy me.

    On one hand, it may be better to ask if a person needs help if it appears that they clearly do. But if you are going to do that, be aware that if someone is abused they are going to need a lot more help than a chat in a ladies room. To the person who feels so strongly about intervening, perhaps place the National Domestic Violence line in your cell, so as to provide a potential person with a lifeline and a person trained to provide some actual assistance without putting the victims life in greater jeopardy.

    mouse, you know who you are and who your Daddy is. Forget everyone else. You deserve to be in this world exactly who and what you are. You certainly fought for that right. So did your Daddy. i'm not a hugger but hugs to you both.

    jade

    www.jadescastle.wordpress.com

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    1. HI Jade,

      Yes, it's entirely likely they (the women) hadn't thought it through. And mouse is sure she's said somewhere (or maybe just thought it) that such a remark to a stranger cornered in a bathroom -- the person would likely never admit it anyway.

      And if they did? What would those women do? Call the police? What would they do? Likely nothing at all. Because they actually have to see it. They might refer the person to a help line, but that's really all. Like mouse said this isn't really a bdsm issue because these women had no idea about that. It's about making an assumption -- seeing something that for whatever reason made them uncomfortable or jealous or excited or revolted...who knows....

      Like one reader pointed out..they probably didn't see mouse's reactions or smiles and just saw what Daddy did -- ignoring his body language completely too.

      Thanks for the hugs!
      mouse

      Delete
  18. The thing is that behaviour that you are referring to as gentlemanly is seen as oppressive and paternalistic. Ordering food for a woman is viewed as controlling and sexist, referring to a time when women couldn't read menus and their general allegedly fickle minds. Fortunately, there are people who identify with the feminist movement that see BDSM and kink based relationships as a choice, rather than simply something that unenlightened women are brain washed into by male privilege and the like but lots of women still see anyone who would choose this sort of lifestyle as probably unable to give informed consent to begin with.

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    Replies
    1. It's rather sad isn't it?

      But yes, mouse does see the point.



      Delete
  19. I was reading about how he was treating you at the restaurant and thinking " oh my gosh that is so hot" and then to see that someone viewed that as abuse instead of adoration and care?! I don't think though that the answer to someone else dissing your relationship is for you to give him even more control. If that's what HE wants.....but what does that prove? You know who you are and how much you are loved...who cares what they think?

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