Preferences

Last week, when we emerged from our bedroom, mouse could smell the heater was on. It's bittersweet for mouse, the change of seasons. The days becoming short, with endless nighttime. Here it means rain and lots of it; endless and depressing. The only glimmer or memory of summer is mouse's pretty pink nails and toes. Eventually she'll give into the peer pressure of seasonal obligates and go with a french manicure or a festive red. For now, they remain pretty and pink...girly.

Of course, Daddy would prefer a french manicure all the time, but the simple pleasure of pink...the draw of it for mouse, is one indulgence he can offer her. The other night in bed, mouse commented that she's worried one day he'll take away her pink nails. It really bothers her. He asked about that..why was that silly nail color so important?

It's not outlandish, or obnoxious, or those loud fluorescent pink colors that wears on mouse after a while (she got her toes done in that color over the summer and didn't like it). Really mouse would never have the nails painted a color he'd totally disapprove of. No black or green or blue...No christmas trees or flowers either (she did ONCE get a flower on her big toe, and he remarked it looked cheap). Maybe it's just a form of limited self expression?

Limited because she'd pick a color he'd approve of or maybe not hate. Working within his guidelines, based on comments he's made like when she did the flower on the toe, or super bright glow-in-the-dark pink over the summer. Listening to him and using that to guide her -- really the toe color isn't a huge issue for him as the finger nail color is.

Really, mouse can't answer why it's so important to her, yes she wants to please him -- that's why she pays such close attention to what she saw as guidelines. Maybe that limited form of self-expression is the best way to explain it. Of course, he could force mouse into wearing nothing but the french manicure by complimenting her or complaining about any other color...

There have been times where mouse did get a shade of pink he didn't like it. One kinda sparkled a little with iridescent qualities he didn't like. The shade overall was fine, but the iridescent was a firm no -- for her toes, it was fine, not for her fingers...

Daddy pulled mouse close to him and looked at mouse's hands, he kissed her fingers and told her he loved her. He said he hadn't realized how much thought mouse had given the color of her nails and asked if it was stressful to her. It's more stressful to think about the pink going away than it is to find a shade he'll accept. Unless he doesn't accept any color...

In the end he said on this odd point, he didn't really care. The nail color isn't an expectation, how her nails are kept over all is, but the color -- yes he admitted mouse has skimmed awful close to the line of acceptable fingernail polish. Her current color is an example of that (it's more or less a baby pink). It doesn't bother him...and he said he knows mouse is happy when she chooses that particular color.

Overall the discussion was interesting - albeit odd.